frommtvtomommy

The Why me’s?

In Uncategorized on February 4, 2012 at 2:12 am

I am feeling the most annoying sensation of “the why me’s.” You know, when you compare yourself to everyone, and feel like you fall short. When you wonder why this is hard for yourself as compared to those who have something easier? It is pathetic. I should be grateful for everything that I have–I am, I truly am, but this week has brought on a serious case of the “why me’s.”
Why do we compare ourselves to others? Why do we as a race of people do this? I tell myself to compare myself to me–to better myself as to who I was, and who I’d like to be, but there’s always this nagging voice that says–but so- and so has this…
It is a one-way street to nowhereville. Nothing can be gained from the Why Me’s.
I think one of the biggest triggers is my resentment that I was so sick while pregnant, and have to worry about it happening to me again if I were ever pregnant again, while so many people can simply just try and enjoy the process. I have to have a treatment plan in set. Not very romantic or fun. I also feel my relationships with family members/community members have also triggered this feeling. People say it takes a village to raise a child, yet when the village is not very welcoming or available, the story changes. In a lot of ways, I have become more self-reliant and confident, which is something I needed badly. My confidence still kind of stinks, but it is better than it was.
I guess everyone is allowed to have his or her own pity party now and again, but honestly, it’s counterproductive and doesn’t get me/you/anyone anywhere. Instead, it’s better to find solutions to problems, and just try to simply not give a hoot what others have, do, or say.
I’ve got my baby, my hubby, and my dog. What is better than that?!

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