The Meak Lady: the Backlash against Bigmouth Females

Seems like men really like their women lukewarm, a bit drippy, and slightly quiet.

If you have read my blogs or you know me, you know damn well that I don’t fit those categories.And you know what, it’s a cold, lonely day’s night when you’re a woman with chutzpah. A bigmouth at times. Outspoken. Silly and irreverent. Honest. Perverted. Slightly anxious. Okay, so more than slightly.

Why do men want the wallflowers? Why must the Donna Reed’s, Donna Martin’s,Reese Witherspoon’s, and Kate Middleton’s get all the love?

Where is the respect and admiration for those of us who don’t care enough to pander to your low self-esteem and tiny penis problems and insecurities?

Where is the passion for the woman who makes the sex joke at the wrong time, and in the wrong place, with a total smile and good intention in her heart?

I used to impersonate Dr. Ruth as a kid. I dressed up as Pee Wee Herman. I can learn voices adeptly and within minutes. I don’t like the Bachelor, football, or Twilight. I don’t know how to bake well, and I cannot fix something to save my life. I will never wear clothes from LL Bean or Talbots. I am reluctantly facing the fact that I cannot wear combat boots and have pink hair anymore, lest I never get hired again.

I still love the Sex Pistols, and I like to comment on chick’s boobs.

I will probably never make your lunch (at least not daily), and I definitely won’t  feel shy about telling your friends how you sometimes forget to flush the toilet. I will hold back on the important stuff though.

There isn’t enough love for the lady with a loudmouth, mainly because we don’t fit your picture of lady hood.

I’m not going to scratch my vagina in public, or walk around with my tits hanging out, but I will probably tell you my political opinions, although I won’t step on yours.

I may even read–gasp–large books that don’t involve S and M acts, or sparkly vampires. I prefer S and M mildly in reality, and my vampires more like Keifer Sutherland and the gang in the Lost Boys.

I will probably never totally understand football–I will get enough of it to understand what you are saying and to engage you enough because I care–but I will never truly give a shit.

I am just me. You men want me to keep quiet, be bland, and don’t be anxious.

Essentially, I am supposed to just divorce myself from my personality.

Look, there are days I wished I could be a bit more subdued. Days I wish I were more elegant like Hillary, and not as honest as Joan Rivers. There were many times I even tried to hold back, and to keep myself at bay, but it just doesn’t work.

The real me always comes out, and honestly, even if the menfolk don’t like their “women” loud and a bit neurotic, I can’t help it.

Sometimes I am quiet–particularly if I feel uncomfortable. I have been around certain people who silence me out of fear, or anxiety, but in general, I find being quiet dull. I always have something to say. Maybe it’s not always that wonderful or poignant, but it’s me.

If you don’t like it, you can kindly go jerk off  your minuscule excuse for a pee-pee in a cellar with a big obese woman with a mustache, chin hair, and belly button lint who likes singing off key  Bette Midler’s “The Rose” in Yiddish or German.

Or,ahem, you can kindly look the other way.

Ah, it was so much better the first way I said it…


3 thoughts on “The Meak Lady: the Backlash against Bigmouth Females

  1. Kari Ryerson says:

    Where is the respect and admiration for those of us who don’t care enough to pander to your low self-esteem and tiny penis problems and insecurities? Probably hiding from the chick that just told them they are insecure and have a small penis. :/ bad choice of words. I personally don’t respect or admire anyone who doesn’t care and insults me in one breath. Maybe that sentence reads the wrong way but… consider changing it a little? If it is what you meant, there is your answer. If it isn’t quite what you meant then it comes off as you being an ignorant “C word”. 😉 *nudges the mommy with a smile*

    I tend to agree that men go for the less challenging women, I feel your frustration. I could say the same for men who go for dumb girls or those who seem to have no self respect at all.

    After being sent to the back row by guy after guy in favor of very nice or cute but ultimately silly women that have trouble with their own language and worry about split ends. We know it isn’t because we are not pretty or interesting. I can fix things. Hell, I can BUILD things. So what is the deal? So many chicks getting the proposals while I was getting trod upon. I mean there were double as many people interested in taking me out but why wasn’t I getting picked for the team? Here’s what I have found over the years by asking repeatedly “Why?” post-dump or cheat:

    1.) I am apparently intimidating.
    I have been told that one of the worst feelings a guy can have is to feel dumb and apparently knowing a lot about a lot of things and speaking about them confidently makes you intimidating. That is REALLY a code word for feeling dumb, uncool or less than adequate. Okay, good. I didn’t want THAT guy anyway. Number one should read ‘He was intimidated.’

    2.) I am crazy.
    What this really means is that I am tenacious. I generally don’t want to argue or talk about every little thing but if I am pressed you will find that I defend my corner to the end. When I didn’t want to participate in conflict compromise for me is really “I told you to leave me the hell alone, I bet you are sorry NOW” No means no, Buddy. If that means I am crazy, so be it. I am entitled to my boundaries and I will defend them. Again, we could change number 2 to “He is annoying and lacks the ability to respect my decisions and space” but I;ll own this one. Fine, I’m crazy. Enjoy your gym sock girl.

    3.) I am too social or there is too much competition.
    Remember that insecure small penis issue you mentioned? Now I get the occasional opportunity to see the ex’s with this problem glare at me from afar across the internet. If only I could have learned to shut myself away for one man, then I might be loved and saved from a life of cats. *eyeroll*

    4.) When pressed for a decision between me and another girl (yes, I KNOW there should not be another girl but it happens) I was deemed to be “tough enough to take it” and able to move on while the delicate flower they were banging behind my back, was not. Coincidentally these girls were not delicate enough emotionally to not actively try to SCREW up my life or viciously pursue a guy they had no interest in until he was taken. Also, not delicate enough to forget to stick their noses up at me as if they had won some prize. Uh, you can keep him slutbreath. Thanks. And no, I’m not fooled into thinking the onus isn’t totally on the dude for trying to keep his ego stroked at all times. Wait, what was I talking about? This is my fault HOW again? Pft.

    That is the top 4 reasons I have been given. I am pretty quiet most of the time but I get my loudmouth on from time to time. I do shots with the guys and talk about music and while I’m not really one to comment on boobs, I will enjoy the odd dirty joke.

    Everyone has their opinion. I can’t stand bad hygiene or grooming habits. Dirtiness in general turns me off.That is a deal breaker for me. Nicest, smartest guy in the world could refuse to shave on weekends or not do laundry often enough and that is it. It’s a non-negotiable. Is that fair? Probably not. I might be uptight. I don’t care. Dirty guy doesn’t want to change and I don’t want a ‘face’ full of smelly sandpaper on the weekend. I’ll take the dumber, cleaner guy every time because I just can’t…

    Maybe that is how they feel? On some level loudmouthery is just something some people can’t stomach. Maybe? Regardless you have every right to be yourself and not feel shitty about it. Sorry it is so long. Feel free to clip it from your comments if it is annoying. I just want you to know you are not alone.

    • frommtvtomommy says:

      What I meant by my first sentence is essentially, why should I change myself to make a man feel more manly or secure? Why should I dumb myself down? It’s not that I want to insult anyone. I don’t. I just hate feeling like me being me threatens a dude.

  2. tknight says:

    What if you wear both LLbean and combat boots still? At the same time? And men cant stand my speak outedness. But living out west were no one is this way I am faced more with blank stairs of shock and wonder by both sexes and seem to only collect a few other relocated east coasters. Ive lost many male relationships (lovers, friends, even a cousin or two) over my mouth n my ability to tell it as it is. I think my hubby only married me because he is the wallflower type n I go head strong n say everything he is to kind to say that and I can cook, i enjoy it. Football is a big deal around here but I dont watch it, understand it, or participate in anyway. Oh no, this is momma daughter day in this house, 4+ hrs of Sunday shopping, lunching and doing girl things. He has his space and I get mine.

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