Why I Should Be Tied Up

A brief note on getting tied up:


I think it would be cool if I were to be tied up.

Not in a hostage situation, or because I forgot my school books.

Or because I said “masturbation” during a work meeting twice.

Or because I need to find a way to relax.

Just because it would be cool to be teased like that and have no control.

Type-A people like myself sometimes need someone else to be the boss.

Because it is tiring being a Type-A person sometimes, and also because I am bored.

I am a bit bored, and it would be fun to figure out how to get out of those ropes.

Of course, whomever kept me bondage would have to be good-looking. I can’t imagine like my elementary school librarian doing this to me.

Ugh, I think I just puked in my mouth. A lot.

I think a lot of bossy Type-A’s tend to flock towards S&M for the stress relief–the role switching. It’s the one aspect of sex I have not played with as much as I would have liked to/ would like.

I don’t want anyone to beat me or pee on me. Yuck. In fact, when I was in the 8th grade, I found a porno mag in one of my sister’s drawers–not saying who as I’d be dead meat– and I showed it to my mom, hysterically laughing.

“Look mom, some guy is pissing on a girl.”

I thought the whole thing, the whole magazine was hysterical.

She took the magazine, hitting me over the head with it.

“You wanna read this stuff, do you?” she yelled.

I bet my older sister never got in trouble. Phooey. What shit! All because I thought it was entertaining.

Anyway, it might actually be relaxing and hot to be tied up.

Just not for too long. Then I wouldn’t be able to rule the world with my awesome forthcoming memoir, and general plan to take this world over by Blonde Storm.

With a knot in my heart and throat,



4 thoughts on “Why I Should Be Tied Up

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