frommtvtomommy

Size Matters

In humor, life, love, sex on March 28, 2014 at 2:10 am

Size Matters in life.

Big or small.

If you think it doesn’t, you’re wrong.

Here are a few reasons and scenarios in which size truly matters–and in which direction!

The Ring

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Look. I know that color and clarity matter in a ring and that it’s not all about money but…the bigger and more sparkly, the better.

There’s nothing worse than a sad little diamond, barely shining from the recipient’s hand.

I’m not saying you should go bankrupt for a biotch as buying a home is way more important (and more important than the wedding too) but if you can spring for it, do it.

Every woman will hate your fiancee with a fierce passion and she will love every minute of their jealousy–and you.

The Manhood

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Sorry. Size matters. Does it matter so much that if you have a small penis you should despair?

No. Now I’m not going to go all out and say the cliche comment of, “It’s how you use it,” because if it’s big a few motions will suffice quite honestly, but technique, foreplay, and servicing a female or another male with certain oral means will certainly be enough to have your partner sworn by your lovin’ abilities.

But if you happen to have size in your corner, rejoice! Truly. It is a blessed thing.

Boobs?

Some might say that size matters when it comes to Boobs. I personally feel it’s the perkiness that matters most.

I will let you argue it amongst yourselves. God knows most of my friends and readers are perverts and staring at random boob photos right now. 🙂

Balls

Not testicles, but your balls. Your guts. Having the brass to tell people what you want and how you want it. Size matters. Having guts and taking risks may have its cons, but the rewards are huge. We Jews call it Chutzpah.

Times when size doesn’t matter…

Cars

When a dude drives a big car, I often feel he is suffering… down below. Don’t let your car do the talking for you gentlemen. Let your tactics, brain, and foreplay do the work for you.

Bank Account

It’s not how much you have, it’s how wise you are about investing in it.

Butt

You may like a big butt, but you don’t have  to have a big butt to have a cute one.

Testimony of a petite white girl

Height

It’s appealing to see a tall, leggy, and gorgeous woman. Agreed. I can appreciate that.

But there’s something to be said for being short and compact.

We travel well, take up less room, are cheaper dates because we can’t drink much, are closer to the ground, and are easier to carry or tie up.

With that said, I may have just attracted some serious psychos.

From the lady with big chutzpah, short stature, and a serious appreciation for those gifted in “size”-

Laura

 

 

 

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  1. I once heard someone say, “It’s not about how much money you make, it’s about how much you have in your bank account.” As someone who comes from two parents who are terrible with money, it’s very attractive to me if someone knows how to spend it wisely. I’m not saying I want a tight ass, but a guy who doesn’t gamble all his money away is ideal.

  2. I am getting a £40 wooden engagement ring. Screw diamonds, I want the house!

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