The Language of Women: A Few Basics for Men

Are you there Men? It’s me. Laura. Pint-Sized Blonde Goddess of a Neurotically Warm and Open Nature.

I noticed you complain about how difficult we are to understand.

So true.

So I decided to throw out a few pointers to all of you struggling with women, a woman, or a few women.

Hey, whatever your flavor is your choice. As my dad always says when I ask him what he wants for Father’s Day: “A Blonde, A Brunette, and a Redhead.”

Too bad they don’t come that cheap Dad.

Anyway, I digress. Here are a few basic pointers to keep in the back pocket of your mind the next time you are dealing with a woman.

Always Tell Her You Love Her

Obviously don’t say it if you don’t mean it, but unless she’s turned off by PDA’s or is unaffectionate, tell her you love her. It may work if you’ve been a very bad boy.


Hiding A Body Part

If she is shy about her body, you need to understand unless she’s got an eating disorder, and do your best to remind her however you choose whether physically or verbally, that she is beautiful.

Most women like..


Most chicks like to talk. This sucks if you’re a dude that doesn’t talk much. If you don’t,  I recommend becoming a fantastic listener to make up for your desire to be verbose.

This will mean a lot to her.

Beating Around the Bush

Some women won’t flat out say what they want. They will beat around the bush until they are blue in the face, and you want to jump off a cliff.

Ask her directly what she wants. Don’t wait for her to spit it out. You might lose your last good sperm doing so.

Bitchy Comments

Unless she’s a real bitch, she’s usually mad at you. Call her out on her behavior and ask her to tell you what is really wrong.

We are socialized to be nice, so sometimes telling us that you have made us mad is tough.

I hope these little tidbits have made your Saturday afternoon.

Try these out with the women/woman in your life, and then get back to me on the results. I’m still trying to understand the XY species.

Love Without Backhanded Insults,




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