frommtvtomommy

Parents and Moms: Keep Your Judgments to Yourself

In divorce, motherhood, parenthood on May 20, 2014 at 2:26 am

It was a Saturday morning. I was overjoyed to have my daughter, but not thrilled to take her to buy shoes simply as the day was too nice to be inside, but hey…a girl needs shoes.So I took her in the store when what to my surprise but, she turned into a pain in the butt.

She only wanted to try random shoes on in the store, not the ones that would fit. She picked one pair out and when the store didn’t have her size, she was so mad that she didn’t want to try on the others.

She loved looking at her feet in the shoes but overall, she made it very difficult, probably because she was tired.

Well, I was exasperated. Frustrated with her.

And as I tried to contain myself—the matter wasn’t helped as the store was staffed by 1 lady who was a bitch— I saw a happily or supposedly happily married couple with their two kids looking at me.

I could feel the judgments.

Oh, her kid isn’t behaving.

Oh, look how frustrated with her she is getting.

I wanted to call them out. To grab their two uglyish faces and say, “Guess what dicks? I am getting a divorce. I don’t get to see my kid daily like you do. I don’t have a family anymore.  I cry every day, and I miss what my family was. I miss my partner. I miss my kid.We are going through stuff. Kindly stop being judgmental asses.”

I took the one pair of shoes that the store had and waited at the register…and the bitchy saleslady at Stride Rite wanted to ring the other couple up first even though I had been waiting! All because they were buying more!

As the know-it-all couple said, “Ring her first,” I said, “Yes as I was waiting first.”

Saleslady was not happy.

Too bad biotch.

I left feeling terrible. My daughter is wonderful but she has her bad times and moments. And we certainly–she and I– deserve a bit of a pass these days. These people don’t know my life. Hell, they could both be terminally ill. I don’t know. It would be nice if people stopped to consider that guess what, you don’t know what someone else is going through!

I left dejected, but at the park, I met an angel. She was a beautiful woman with an 8 year-old boy and a 6 month old boy. After overhearing me redirect my daughter, she said, ‘Wow…I wish I talked to my son how you talk to your daughter. I’m definitely doing that with the next kid. You speak to her like an adult, and she’s clearly smart.”

It made that store experience a bit easier to bare.

When she told me she was remarried, I told her I was newly inducted into single motherhood (although my ex is an amazing dad and person).

I tried not to cry.

It’s embarrassing divulging these things when people ask, even though I can write about it publicly…it’s tougher to say to someone’s face.

As I went to chase my daughter who had ran off, she shouted, “You won’t be single long…problem is you’re too smart. You probably scare men away.”

Amen sister.

I wish I could hug her. Her 15 minutes with me were a blessing.

Trying my best but sometimes am my worst,

Laura

 

 

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  1. […] with the idea of being divorced as an orthodox woman, but now she has to struggle through it…with relatively little friend support, the one and sometimes only thing that has saved me for many bad […]

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