4 Signs You’re Burnt Out as a Mom

Burnt out (adj.): A state in which you are mentally unable to handle any more stress. A state in which your energy and mental resources are depleted.

We all have moments in time in which we feel stressed, but sometimes we don’t even realize how burnt out we are even if others around us can see that we are. Being a burnt-out mom is not only bad for you, but it’s also bad for the people around you. Unfortunately, mothers are socialized to ignore their needs; taking care of us as mothers is considered selfish. Worse still, asking for help is seen as somewhat weak.

This cultural attitude of the “strong mom” is hurtful to mothers and women. Being strong doesn’t mean working yourself to death until you’re exhausted and mentally spent. Instead, think of your mothering “power” as a business: when a CEO needs someone to take over a department, a good CEO finds a manager to take charge. That manager then finds workers and fills his or her staff up with people to share the workload.

Read More: 4 Signs You’re Burnt Out as a Mom

Trying to Take it Easier,

Laura

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Think You’re Ready to Divorce, Moms? Consider These Things First

Making the choice to divorce is tough. Before we chose to separate, I often asked other divorced people how they knew when they were done.

“What was the deciding factor? How did you know it was right?”

No one had a magic answer for me, but everyone said that, at some point, they knew that divorce was the answer.

I wish I could tell you that, once we decided to divorce, I never doubted my choice, but that would be a lie. In the end, though, I know it was a sane choice even if a hard one. So if you’re considering taking the plunge and severing your marital ties, here are some things, as moms and potential single moms, that you should consider.

Read More: Think You’re Ready to Divorce, Moms? Consider These Things First

Make an Informed Choice,

Laura

12 Ways “Type A” People Love Differently

Everyone has his or her own way of expressing love to a partner, but “Type A” people have their own little particular way of showing the people they love a little TLC.

Sometimes, you might feel like your Type A lover always has the answer and you don’t, but we’re not perfect and don’t expect you to be —although we set the bar high for ourselves and sometimes everyone around us.

No matter what, our minds are busy thinking of a million ways to do everything just right and sometimes it’s plain exhausting. Of course, as the object of a Type A’s affection you’ll always feel loved and adored, which is a great thing.

Read More: 12 Ways “Type A” People Love Differently

High-Achieving Love,

Laura

6 Strategies to Teach Your Angry Kid to Calm Down

Like most humans, kids get angry, except for when young children get angry, they don’t always know the right way to let off steam leaving you the mom with a heated child who’s having a wicked temper tantrum. How do you get your kid to express his or her anger in a positive way? When my ex-husband and I separated, my daughter struggled with letting out her anger simply because she was 3 and so young when we began the divorce process and didn’t (and still doesn’t quite) understand divorce. It’s complicated enough for adults to grieve the end of a marriage, much less a toddler or preschooler. So we sought out a way to help her express and handle her emotions through play therapy. Try teaching your kid these six strategies to blow a gasket without raising an actual ruckus.

Read More: 6 Strategies to Teach Your Angry Kid to Calm Down

Breathe In, Breathe Out,

Laura

Going To A Wedding As A Divorcée Was A Lot Less Romantic

It was the first wedding I attended since my ex-husband and I decided to separate. I hadn’t been to a wedding alone since eight years ago (before we met) and I’d just started to properly grieve the end of my marriage.

How could this wedding possibly be fun? I felt bad because it was a celebration of love for one of my dearest and most loved friends. I was so happy for her, a single mom who found her right fit, her happy ending.

Yet I was so scared to go. What if I cried and not in the “Oh, here’s a few tears. Isn’t this so romantic?” type of way. What if the joyous occasion was clouded in my mind by the fact that my marriage failed, despite standing in front of my loved ones and pledging to be there through good times and bad?

You should always be happy for your friends, but sometimes it’s impossible to not be sad for yourself.

Read More: Going To A Wedding As A Divorcée Was A Lot Less Romantic

Stronger Than I Thought,

Laura

Is it Time to Leave Your Job?

For some moms, going to work is an easy choice because they love their jobs, but for other moms working is simply a choice dictated by financial need. Sometimes though, a job may end up not being worth that paycheck. Here are a few situations in which you may want to give your two weeks’ notice whether permanently or temporarily.

Work Stress

Do you come home with constant agita, migraines, nausea, or other health issues? Are you having trouble sleeping? Is work stress and problems spilling into your home life? Is it impossible to just leave work at work? If you answered yes, it sounds like your job has become a pressure cooker. Add bonus points if you’ve lost or gained a considerable amount of weight.

Is this stress affecting not just you but also your family members? If you find yourself snapping at your kids, distracted while playing with them, forgetting family events, or struggling to keep up at home and work, your work stress may be affecting more than you alone.

Read More: Is it Time to Leave Your Job?

Work- Life Balance Isn’t Easy,

Laura

How to Build a New Support System as a Single or Divorced Mom

If you’re a newly single mom or a single or divorced mother who is still having a hard time finding backup, getting a support system in place is crucial. Whether it’s finding someone to help with your children or creating new holiday traditions as a new “family” of sorts, creating a new village for yourself will enrich your life and your children’s.

Camaraderie

Whether you’ve been a single parent for two days or two years, having women to turn to who have been there and done that is valuable. It took me a year to finally make my own social media group comprised of single moms. I added acquaintances and friends (and suggested they add friends too) in order to get some support on questions and problems I had that my other friends and family couldn’t answer. While I know some ladies better than others, I consider them a good source of information and one I need as I venture into a new life with my daughter, alone.

Read More: How to Build a New Support System as a Single or Divorced Mom

It Takes a Village,

Laura

What it’s Like to Meet Your Ex’s New Love on Social Media

My ex has a girlfriend.

I don’t know how serious it is or how serious it isn’t, but she’s there. Just hanging out on his Facebook page, silently.

She’s there, just casually mentioned by him a month ago.

Whether she’s a she of importance or a she of the moment, she’s there.

It’s the first girlfriend post separation in the land of divorce.

He technically “won” the race, as in, he is the first person to move on, and not me.

This bothered me initially.

Like, “Why not me?”

My stomach turned seeing her face on his Facebook page.

But then I took another look and my first thought was, “She looks nice. Happy. Harmless.”

Read More: What it’s Like to Meet Your Ex’s New Love on Social Media

It’s Hard, but I am Trying my Best,

Laura