I recently met a man randomly. It wasn’t online. It was a simple chance encounter.
Honestly, it was the kind of random encounter that novelists and film makers concoct in some huge romantic comedy or drama. It was the type of thing I could talk about happening in theory, but it wouldn’t actually happen.
Until it did.
He was a supposedly, loving, smart, educated, kind and easy-going man. We had an instant connection and rapport. He didn’t leave me alone for much more than a second, always calling or texting me to ask how I was. To tell me he was thinking about me. To help me with something. Always another excuse to just randomly stop by. Even if he wasn’t in the area, he was suddenly in the area.
I thought to myself, “What a great guy.”
I couldn’t get enough of our conversations. Everything about him, was amazing. It was as if I had known him forever. I could sit in silence with him, happily.
Yes, me. Quiet. With him. A man.
But was he really so great? Was he really so genuine?
For all his presence that seemed to untangle my greatest heart knots, there remained one absence: the ability to move forward with a relationship.
He said those” three words” yet said to me: I am just not ready to feel that way.
What did I say?
Put your money where your mouth is pal. And save your words of adoration for when they can become realities. Actions.
It’s sweet and all for a man to shower you with attention and sweet nothings, but sweet nothings are NOTHING unless they are backed up by reality.
Words are hot air and white noise.
Real love and wanting is time spent together. Hot sex shared only by you two or however you two envision it. Real love and care is exploring each other and being open to learning about one another.
He seemed to want to be close but wanted to keep a slight wall up just in case.
I couldn’t understand how such a genuine guy who was giving me so much of his time could be so unsure about wanting more. He wasn’t like men from the past– mean or trying to get in the sack with me, so what was his deal? His problem?
In the past, I might have held on. Pushed more. Tried harder. Sold myself.
In the past I would have waited on the sidelines until he got it together and giving myself selflessly without getting anything in return.
But thankfully, that stupid girl is dead and gone right in the dirt.
In her place, is a woman who knows her price and my price is high.
To have my love, the price is high not because I am some snide materialistic bitch, but because I know that I am worth someone’s time, attention and actions. I am more than sweet nothings. I am more than just “I care about you but am not ready” bs, the kind of stuff I heard in my twenties ad nausem from boys.
I retired from boys a long time ago. I have since moved onto: MEN.
To have my love, the person will have to act and show me with a commitment that matches mine. I do not love lightly, nor do I treat the ones I love with neglect. I am a present and giving partner. I am actions, I am words– I am real and consistent.
My message matches my deeds.
If I say I love you, I show you I love you.
It’s that simple.
So I will never feel bad when I encounter someone trying to grasp parts of me, my time and love for a lower price than the asking amount, and me saying : Sorry, not sorry but don’t you see the sign?
The sign says that I am asking a certain price. Which requires you my friend, to be a man and pay said price in order to receive all my love and energy, which happens to be kickass amazing.
You may have thought that perhaps I wouldn’t understand my value or asking price. That perhaps I might be willing to settle for less than what I am worth but you see, I am not.
My single status is one of choice. Because no one has offered the right proposition yet. It’s not because I am desperate or sad or unwanted. I am sexy, powerful, smart, funny, honest, real and put-together. I need no one.
If you are in my life it’s because I want you here.
And if you cannot pay the price and would like to set up rent in my heart for cheap I am here to tell you:
I take no freeloaders or transient parties.
If you are too afraid and want a trial stay I offer to you: that my love is not a guarantee. It is a daily renewal that has to happen on my end and yours. That if you are the kind of BOY that is that scared, you need to walk away because I am a woman and I don’t play with orphans.
I harbor no adoptions or foster situations.
If you would like a place right here, next to me?
You have to be willing to invest your time and if not, here’s the door.
Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.
A Very Sexy and Empowered Woman Who Doesn’t Need a Hanger on.
P.S. Men, feel free to apply. I am eager to match your price points and bring a lot to the bargaining table.