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Archive for April, 2016|Monthly archive page

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Functional Vs. Dysfunctional Relationships: The 10 BIG Differences

In dating, love, marriage, relationships on April 29, 2016 at 7:58 pm

Some people wouldn’t know a toxic relationship if it bit them in the ass. I’m always surprised how some people can float around in unstable relationships, not realizing that how the two of them interact is completely harmful. Most of the time, I would wager that when you feel bad about yourself or have grown up and experienced toxic people in your life, you often associate these behaviors as “normal” because it’s all you know.

But if you want to know if a relationship is functional or totally, utterly dysfunctional, here are the 10 big differences that clearly delineate the two.  See where your relationship lies.

  1. Stability 

Functional: A functional relationship is marked by stability. Stable moods between the couple. Stable relations. Stable commitment. Every relationship has moments of instability and mystery, but for the most part things will be smooth. Functional relationships command stability.

Dysfunctional: Constant ups and downs, and instability and uncertainty, are the true marks of a dysfunctional relationship.

Read More: Functional Vs. Dysfunctional Relationships: The 10 BIG Differences

Where Do You Two Lie?

Laura

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11 Struggles Only Type-A People Will TRULY Understand

In life on April 29, 2016 at 4:43 pm

Some people may find “Type A” people too high-strung or overachieving, but the fact is, Type A people are brilliant, too. Yes, we may end up with heart issues before Type Bs, but the pros to being a Type A include:

  • We get sh*t done.
  • We don’t stop fighting for what we believe in.
  • We hit every nook and cranny.
  • We remember what you say and listen.
  • We play hard and party hard.

Of course, being a Type A, there are certain struggles we experience in our bold, high-achieving and sometimes stressful lives that other folks simply won’t get.

Read More: 11 Struggles Only Type-A People Will TRULY Understand

Pajamas? NO WAY,

Laura

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Getting Pregnant During The Divorce Process

In divorce, divorce advice on April 29, 2016 at 4:40 pm

Jennifer Garner. Megan Fox. Julia Roberts.

The list of stars undergoing a divorce, who are also pregnant, is rapidly growing.

To be frank, my first thought was “WTF, celebs?”

I mean, I won’t lie. Jen and Ben are quite possibly my favorite celebrity couple, minus Brangelina because they’re both so incredibly hot, but getting pregnant is the absolute worst way to save a marriage or go through the divorce process. This isn’t to say that a pregnant woman shouldn’t leave a partner! No, not at all. But what I am saying is, getting pregnant while a couple is having serious marital strife and filing for divorce is irresponsible. So what is really happening here, underneath the surface? Because these celebs wouldn’t be the first people to think that a baby can save a marriage.

Read More: Getting Pregnant During The Divorce Process

Don’t Do IT!

Laura

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No, I Do Not Need To ‘Forgive’ My Date Rapist, ThankYouVeryMuch

In trauma recovery, women, women's issues on April 24, 2016 at 4:34 pm

Holding onto anger about anything — a situation, trauma, person or lost circumstance, whatever the case may be — isn’t a punishment to anyone but you. Your wrath will never burn literal holes into any of your enemies (no matter how hard you try); rather, your wrath will burn every single last bit of energy you have.

Your anger will kill off the good parts of you until all that’s left is a negative, seething shell of slavery. Yes that’s right. When you hold onto that kind of anger, you ‘re enslaved.

So when I hopped onto Facebook and saw that my former date rapist who was supposed to be “my friend” was suggested as a “person you may know,” I felt nothing.

Read More: No, I Do Not Need To ‘Forgive’ My Date Rapist, ThankYouVeryMuch

There’s No More Anger,

Laura

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8 Safety Tips You MUST Read Before Dating Online

In dating, dating advice, Uncategorized on April 21, 2016 at 2:04 pm

When I heard the news about the murder of Ingrid Lyne, single mother of three children and Seattle resident, I was floored.

It could have been me.

Not that I know that monster who killed her or live in Seattle, but that I am a single mother looking for love online. It wasn’t the first date. The news reports states that they had been seeing each other for six to eight weeks. A new romance gone completely and utterly, devastatingly wrong. Should I then, single woman, step away from the dating apps and sites? My paranoia says yes — run away! But the reality is that monsters exist everywhere and anywhere and so, if women want to online date we must keep our heads about us and make smart choices when meeting strangers for the possibility of true love. Here are some tips to keep in mind after you’ve swiped right and decided to meet, face-to-face.

Read More: 8 Safety Tips You MUST Read Before Dating Online

 

Be Careful,

Laura

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To The Man Who Stopped Appreciating His Wife

In divorce, love, marriage, marriage advice on April 21, 2016 at 1:58 pm

Dear Man,

You’ve grown tired of your wife‘s sh*t, you say. Why doesn’t she do X, Y or Z more? Why does she nag you? Why does she leave the laundry for you to fold? Why doesn’t she wear more lingerie? Why does she breathe funny?

You can’t help yourself it seems. Everything your wife does annoys the living hell out of you. You look at your friends and their marriages. They seem so happy. Your one friend? His wife is so hot. She looks like she would be wild in bed, even when the kids are awake.

Your other friend? His wife is so sweet. I bet she never talks back, you think. You find yourself scrutinizing all the many “wives” in your path. They’re better. Hotter. Nicer. In all things and in all ways, your wife fails.

Read More: To The Man Who Stopped Appreciating His Wife

Criticism of Others is the Sign of True Internal Self-Hatred,

Laura

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8 Signs You’re the Worst Mother Ever

In motherhood, parenthood on April 20, 2016 at 3:24 pm

1. You’ve said “no” to your threenager 

Threenager (n): A tiny person of three years of age who is moody, unpredictable, demanding and similar to its older peer, the teenager.

Your threenager believes that marshmallows and puffs are the dinner of champions but you as the mother put the kibosh on the sweet treats for dinner and instead, provide a meal that encompasses all four of the food groups. Survey Says? You’re the meanest most awful mom to ever exist, according to your threenager, that is.

2. You can’t Pinterest if your life depended on it, and according to your kid, it does

Your child wants you to make Star Wars-themed cupcakes for the class party.

“Can’t you make Yoda-looking cupcakes like Sophia’s mom?”

Read More: 8 Signs You’re the Worst Mother Ever

Congrats!

Laura

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5 Ways to Forgive Your Ex

In divorce, divorce advice, relationships on April 19, 2016 at 8:24 pm

It’s time.

Time to forgive your ex. For the worst things. For the little tiny minutiae that bothered you. For everything.

It doesn’t matter if he or she was the biggest loser or the best person ever. No matter what your individual case is, it’s time to forgive your ex and say goodbye to the old fights and even the new fights you might have, if you’re divorcing with kids and stuck with each other for life.

What good does it truly do for you to hang on to old feelings? If you wanted to keep fighting and feeling terrible, wouldn’t you have stayed married?

Read More: 5 Ways to Forgive Your Ex

Move On,

Laura

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4 Mistakes Every Mom Makes With the First Child

In motherhood, parenthood on April 19, 2016 at 1:39 am

It’s your first child . . . ahh! Everyone, break out the hand sanitizer before you come within two feet of my kid.

Remember that stage? Remember wishing you could put your baby in a bubble? Remember attempting to build said bubble? As a mom of an only, I watch parents with their second and third children and I see a clear difference between how they handle the kids and how I handled my first. The fact is the first child is in many ways, the guinea pig and the showstopper of our parenthood. By that I mean we are testing out everything as we gain our motherhood legs. We’ve never been mothers before and despite what people told us, it isn’t quite what we had thought. It’s better and sometimes, it’s worse than had we imagined. The first child grows with us. The first child learns lessons because we didn’t know better. The first child has our attention, 24/7. We focus on them and we put on our “very best parenting hats” because let’s face it: the more kids, the more tired you are. I am the youngest of four girls. I stand by that statement. As long as I was breathing, all was right with the world.

To all the first children out there, you got the best of us as parents and in some ways, the worst of our learning curve. We apologize in advance, but it’s just life, kiddo.

Read More: 4 Mistakes Every Mom Makes With the First Child

We’re Learning With Our First Kid,

Laura

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Get It Together, Girl: 13 Signs Your Life Is A Hot Freaking MESS

In life, love, mental health, women's issues on April 15, 2016 at 7:52 pm

We hate to break it to you, BUT…

We all have heartaches, down periods, tribulations and stressors in our life. When you take a mental photograph of your whole life from birth to today, chances are you’re going to have some serious grey and black splotches.

But overall, you wake up each day and do what you have to do. You’ve got it together. Unless of course, you’re a hot freaking mess! 

No doubt, if you’re a catastrophic mess, people know it. The bad news is most likely, people are judging you or being empathetic toward you. The good news is every one becomes a mess now and then. But when your life has a constant orange roadblock sign in it and every one, including yourself, decides that your life is a big pile of sh*t, that’s where the problems arise.

Here are 13 signs your life is a hot mess.

Read More: Get It Together, Girl: 13 Signs Your Life Is A Hot Freaking MESS

Pull it Together Now,

Laura