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Archive for October, 2016|Monthly archive page

These 4 Signs Might Mean You Have Postpartum Depression

In pregnancy on October 27, 2016 at 7:18 pm

(PPD) is more common than you’d think. In fact, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 11 to 20 percent of women who give birth have symptoms of it. What’s more, you can begin experiencing PPD up to a year after having a baby, according to the American Pregnancy Association.

But how do you know you have it? While each woman is different, there are consistent themes when it comes to symptoms, say Mary L. Rosser, M.D., Ph.D., director, department of obstetrics and gynecology, Montefiore Health System, and Allison Kurzman, M.D., psychiatrist and clinical instructor of psychiatry at Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine.

You may experience one, a combination of a few, or all of the symptoms, although it varies by individual, according to Rosser and Kurzman. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, those who have experienced depression or bipolar disorder before, have a family history of mental illness, had medical complications during childbirth, or lacked emotional support from a partner, family, or friends during pregnancy could all be at an increased risk.

Read More: These 4 Signs Might Mean You Have Postpartum Depression

Are You Depressed?

Laura

These Are the 4 Stages of a Mom Meltdown

In humor, motherhood on October 27, 2016 at 7:04 pm

Look, it’s not only kids who go over the edge — it’s us mommies too. In fact, now that I mention it, our kids are the biggest reason we’re sometimes ready to blow our gaskets. That, and our partners. And lack of chocolate. Definitely lack of chocolate.

When we can’t keep our composure anymore and are about to bite off a bat’s head, you know that whoever caused us to lose it is in deep, deep trouble. Read through for the four stages of the Mom Meltdown, brought to you by whiny kids, PMS, too much laundry, another PTA fundraiser, and not being able to pee alone in private.

1. The “Is it Getting Hot in Here?” Stage

Your kid asked you for the 50th time if he could use the iPad.

Your partner complained about dinner and then decided to leave dirty clothes on the floor.

The cat puked on your new rug.

You are this close to crying and this close to taking the family dog and leaving for the night, but it’s OK. The cat puke is almost all the way out of the rug, you’re giving your partner the silent treatment, and you told your kid to take the darn iPad already. Your sanity is still intact . . . for now.

Read More: These Are the 4 Stages of a Mom Meltdown

Mommy Needs a Helper,

Laura

How to Build Your Strength To Leave

In divorce, divorce advice on October 26, 2016 at 5:54 pm

Hands down the greatest fear involving divorce is the fear of the unknown. It’s the fear of walking away from something you have known for years, maybe even for decades, simply to walk out into the great unknown. If you’re divorcing with kids, the second greatest fear is “How will my kids cope?” but before you can even consider how you will get your kids through the ordeal, you have to commit to making the choice to leave.

I wish I had magic that could tell you that making this choice will be crystal clear and vivid. Indeed, it may. There are some people who after much fretting, getting the feeling and vision that the only choice for survival is to leave, right away! This vision/emotion will carry someone through the whole divorce process.

And then of course, there are many people who fall into the “grey” area. They may know leaving is the best choice, but as they make the call, they struggle internally with whether or not it’s really the right thing. The good news in all of this is no matter what, I can tell you that even if you leave a marriage feeling uncertain and fearful, eventually, you will see that you made the right choice.

That crystal clear vision WILL come.

Read More: How to Build Your Strength To Leave

You Can Do It,

Laura

9 Little Gestures That Mean, YES GIRL, He’s Into You

In dating, dating advice, relationships on October 24, 2016 at 6:57 pm

You met someone and you’re in the new stage in which you’re really not sure where you stand with him or where things are heading. So what happens next? It’s the game of love — or heartbreak.

You two do that dating tango: the dance in which you decide if you’re really in sync with each other or not. But before you decide to get on your metaphorical dancing shoes, pay attention to all of the little things.

It’s not the BIG huge gestures of affection and sweeping statements that really indicate a man is ready to say ‘I love you’. Talk is cheap. Anyone can say they love you (or is into you), but the reality is, it’s the little gestures a man does every day, on occasion, or on a whim that shows just how in love with you he is… or isn’t.

Here are the 9 little gestures that say ‘I love you’ without saying a word:

 

1. He fixes up the house.

If your new dude-to-potentially-be is offering to be Mr. Fixer Upper, chances are high that he’s “fixing” to score you as well. He wants to help take some of the DIY burden off your shoulders and give the place in which you dwell a lot of love. Why? Because he probably loves you, too, at least a little.

Read More: 9 Little Gestures That Mean, YES GIRL, He’s Into You

OH– He Wants You!

Laura

10 Myths, Pros and Cons of Being a Breadwinning Mom

In career, marriage, motherhood on October 24, 2016 at 1:56 am

Did you know that breadwinning moms make up some 40 percent of all U.S. households’ major (or equal with partner) earners? That’s according to a 2013 Pew study, and we hear that the number has risen since then. Yep—that’s a lot of us working moms!

Even so, there are myths and stereotypes that still surround breadwinning moms, like these:
She emasculates her husband with her success.
She’s too concerned with her career.
She’s bound for divorce with her success.

But beyond these less-than-flattering and less-than-truthful attributions are the positives that we know, like the fact that commanding a good salary and supporting your family is a wonderful and empowering scenario. The reality is that today there are many pluses to being a breadwinning mom that go beyond making the sole or larger paycheck—in or a marriage or not.

Here, a family and relationship expert—and real-life breadwinning mom—helps us dismantle the falsehoods and promote the truths of this way of life.

1. Myth: A breadwinning mom’s success wrecks her marriage or relationship.

The idea that heterosexual breadwinning moms are ruining their relationships with their career/financial status is a modern-day myth, asserts Stephanie Coontz, author of the award-winning A Strange Stirring: The Feminine Mystique and American Women at the Dawn of the 1960sand director of research at the Council on Contemporary Families. “It used to be true that couples where a women earned more than her husband faced a higher risk of divorce. But for marriages formed in the 1990s and later, that is no longer true.” Take that, myth! But …

Read More: 10 Myths, Pros and Cons of Being a Breadwinning Mom

Times Are a Changin’

Laura

7 Things I Want to Say to Strangers During My Child’s Public Meltdown

In humor, motherhood, parenthood on October 24, 2016 at 1:35 am

Kids will meltdown and it will always happens at the worst moment, like when they’re meeting someone very important to you, or in public among a large crowd. I’m pretty certain that children time these tantrums appropriately to humiliate us to the largest possible degree.

And truthfully, it’s not your family or friends that care about their behavior so much—it’s total strangers who love to judge you for for every imperfect moment your child has to prove you’re a big fat failure as a mother.

Here are some things I would love to say to strangers as they burn holes into my soul, wishing me into dirt, for all of the bad things my kid has done in public:

1. “She’s just like her [insert other family member name here]”

When my daughter is having a “moment,” I would love to blame it on another family member, simply to relieve myself of those nasty beady stranger eyes, and also to jolt some nonsense into that nosy stranger!

Like, “Oh yeah lady, well she gets this awful habit from her INSERT FAMILY MEMBER NAME HERE—but definitely not me,” and then go on to pick my nose right in front of her.

Charming, right?

2. “If you think you can do a better job, here, she’s yours.”

When strangers be looking at you and your kid like you’re both spawns of Satan, I would love to tell them to try to beat my parenting game.

Read More:7 Things I Want to Say to Strangers During My Child’s Public Meltdown

Everyone is an Expert,

Laura

7 Things I Would Like to Do With Shopkins

In humor, motherhood on October 24, 2016 at 1:32 am

Do the possibilities end?

NO!

Lucky you, they never end. Season upon season upon season, these little hard plastic things that come with those little plastic bags never end. And much to your demise, those little Shopkins faces are so cute that your kids can’t get enough of them… ever.

Thanks to the clever manufacturer, there are so many things your kids can do with their Shopkins—none of which would go on my personal to-do list with Shopkins!

Here are some things I’d like to do with those little plastic toys from hell myself:

1. Throw them in a trash bag and leave them on my ex’s porch.

Want revenge? Why does it have to be hurtful? Why does it have to be a fist to the gut? Can’t it just be a bag full of Shopkins for someone else to collect, step on, poke oneself with, and find in sinks, toilets and bathtubs?

2. Make a trail with them and lead a kid to the ending.

Step 1: Take all your kid’s Shopkins.

Read More: 7 Things I Would Like to Do With Shopkins

Tampon Tara?

Laura

10 Signs Your RELATIONSHIP Is The Reason You’re Miserable

In relationships, Uncategorized on October 24, 2016 at 1:30 am

When someone is in a good relationship, it shows. Their life thrives even under duress, and the relationship is never “in question.” A person in a happy and fulfilling relationship shines in almost every corner of his or her life.

On the other hand, a person in a toxic or unfulfilling relationship has the exact opposite situation. He or she doesn’t thrive. He or she is anxious or often subdued and maybe even depressed. It may seem like “just another relationship,” but the person you spend such an intimate amount of time with will seep into everything you do, think or say.

Here are 10 spot-on signs that your relationship is holding you back from the life you deserve.

1. All the fighting affects your sleep and appetite.

If you and your partner fight so much that you’re constantly having sleep, or if you have appetite issues, your relationship is dragging you into the mud. If there are nights you’re not sleeping and days in which food seems like an option because the two of you are at a crux, it’s not good.

Read More: 10 Signs Your RELATIONSHIP Is The Reason You’re Miserable

End It,

Laura

7 Ways to Handle the Know-It-All Mom of the Group

In motherhood on October 18, 2016 at 1:08 am

You think you have something to offer during a conversation among moms with your own parenting experience, when BAM!, the “Mom Who Knows It All” (hereby known as the MWKA) strikes. She’s got the answer to every problem or her two cents to add in about everything, which she clearly feels is more valuable than what you have to say as she either discredits your input or talks right over you in the process.

It’s easy to get angry at MWKA, but there’s one important thing to remember before you get red in the face.

The MWKA is insecure. She has to say what she does is the “best way” because deep down inside she’s either afraid she’s completely messing up or because she wants people to value her and like her. By adding her opinion in — even if she discredits yours — she thinks this will make her seem valuable and well-liked. She’s not trying (well, in many cases) to be rude to you even if she is; instead, she’s trying to become or seem important.

Keeping this information in mind, here are seven tips for dealing with the MWKA.

Read More: 7 Ways to Handle the Know-It-All Mom of the Group

Let it Fly,

Laura

11 Things You Didn’t Know About Motherhood Before You Became a Mom

In humor on October 12, 2016 at 1:54 am

You read the baby books. You attended birthing class. You interviewed pediatricians. You were ready. Prepared. Set to be a mom! Until you became a mom and realized, you didn’t know jack sh*t about being a mother, now did you?

Nope. You were one clueless SOB.

And now you’re learning on the job. Enjoy those learning curves, ladies. They’re unflattering sometimes, aren’t they?

1. You will hate small toys.

You will step on small toys, like Legos. Legos are supposed to be fun. The reality is when you step on one, you cry like a little b*tch. No one told you Legos were a weapon of war.

Oh yes indeedy, they are!

Let’s not forget the burden of tiny, tiny, tiny toys. Like Shopkins. And all the utensils in the Barbie Dreamhouse.

The utensils in the Barbie Dreamhouse are worse than Barbie’s shoes.

Read More: 11 Things You Didn’t Know About Motherhood Before You Became a Mom

You Knew Jack S&*T,

Laura