He’s not leaving because he doesn’t want to. She’s not leaving because married life is easier.
We all know someone, are friends with someone or dated someone who is in a constant state of “separation” — or worse, on and off with his or her husband or wife.
I had a guy friend who constantly complained about his wife. Divorce threats came out of his mouth like his life depended on it. He “dated” people, wondered why his wife was mad and complained he had to leave her. But guess what? As time went on, nothing changed. He was still the same old hamster, stuck on his wheel.
Then, there was my female friend. The marriage was brutally awful and the plan was to leave him in five months. Then six months. Then seven months. The reasons why she hadn’t yet left him simply changed or got more complex.
Then, there are the numerous “separated guys” — and women too, I’m sure — you go out with, only to discover that they’re not divorced yet, or you knew they weren’t divorced but separated only to discover that their idea of separation doesn’t quite match yours.
Why? Why do people stay despite their pledges to leave?
When a man isn’t leaving his wife, he complains about her non-stop, or you meet him online (or anywhere really) and he says they’re separated.
What does that mean? Maybe they live separately. Maybe you discover they’re “living together” until he can figure things out or any other number of legit or non-legit reasons. Maybe they’re talking to lawyers.
Don’t Believe the Hype,