frommtvtomommy

Archive for 2017|Yearly archive page

10 Marriage Tips From an Ex-Spouse Who Has Been There

In marriage, marriage advice, Uncategorized on April 12, 2017 at 11:28 am

As someone who was once married and now isn’t, I can say that even though I believe there was nothing that could have possibly saved my former marriage, I still think there are things I learned about marriage that I will carry with me to the next relationship. What good is life if you can’t learn lessons from it? Well, my marriage taught me a lot about me, a lot about what I want from someone, and a lot about what I need from someone (and have to give) in order to have a happy marriage the next go-round. Here are 10 marriage tips from an ex-spouse who has been there and done that.

1- Choose your words carefully . . . saying harsh words will only tear apart the marriage.

Read the rest at PopSugar!

Choose Your Battles Wisely,

Laura

10 Compliments Your Wife Loves to Hear

In marriage, marriage advice on April 12, 2017 at 11:26 am

Saying the right thing can mean a world of difference in a marriage, just as saying the wrong thing can, too. A genuine compliment to make a wife feel loved and special can go miles to make a relationship all the better! Here are 10 compliments your wife would love to hear.

1- I love how strong you are — and how determined you are to reach your goals.”

View this article on PopSugar!

And Yes, You’re Gorgeous!

Laura

Finding Treasure Among The Trash

In divorce, life, relationships, single mom on April 11, 2017 at 2:16 am

My one-year divorce-aversary is coming up quickly.

It’s made me stop to think about the year and overall, it’s been a rough one.

Every time I thought I had things under control, life would pull the rug under me and laugh saying, “Not so fast, blondie.”

There were some moments in which I thought—I just can’t do this. Many moments. The feeling was overwhelming, but then suddenly, I turned a corner. Not that I don’t sometimes feel defeated about caring for myself and my daughter on my own…not that I don’t look at my bank account and think, “When does it get better?” because I do… a lot.

Not that I don’t think, when another issue comes up with my ex, “What now?”

But that I believe wholeheartedly that I will manage it. Somehow, I managed when I thought I couldn’t during numerous moments throughout this year. And honestly, out of the three years we have been done with our marriage, this one was the hardest by far—proving that no two divorce journeys are alike.

And here it is spring. A time of new growth. A time of warmer sun. A time of longer days.

And for the first time, I will be without my child for six whole nights.

Originally when we split, we shared her time 50/50, and it was challenging making a life for myself when she was gone with dad. Then as her dad started to take less and less and less time with her, suddenly, it was the two of us again, attached at the hip just like we had been when I was a stay-at home mom.

I’ve never been apart from my daughter for this long. I’ve never missed the chance to dye eggs or see the bunny in time for Easter. It’s this time of the year that I am most sentimental about missing my stay-at home days with her… she just turned six and I still remember those days…the ones rocking her in her chair, her nursing to sleep. The ones in which we hopped from park to park, drawing on the sidewalks, writing letters, and swinging on swings…climbing to the top and me wondering if she wasn’t going just a little too high…or not.

How quiet the house is going to be for six whole nights…getting used to that silence. Getting used to being alone with my own thoughts.

 

Read more: Finding Treasure Among The Trash

Diamond in the Rough,

Laura

10 Ways You’re Making Him PANIC (And Back Away From Your Relationship)

In dating advice, relationships on April 11, 2017 at 2:12 am

Sometimes, it’s his own character or situation that provokes panic from your actions; in other cases, you do stuff to bring on panic that never existed.

There are many situations that can scare guys away and you have to decide if you’re causing him anxiety or if he’s dealing with issues that cause him to panic over everything. Here are 9 ways you’re scaring him away.

1. You mention marriage any moment you can.

Sure, things are going well for you and your guy, but you are pushing him to the edge with your marriage talk. He just got comfortable with the idea of you two being a solid, committed pair, and now, no matter what you two are doing, marriage is part of every conversation.

Emails with wedding ring images. Pinterest boards on weddings you just “happen” to send him links to. Pointing out couples that are engaged. You don’t even have regular conversations anymore. You’re making him panic hardcore.

2. You never let him reach out to you. 

You are the one to initiate every move and you’re not giving him the chance to let him chase you or make plans. Even if you’re not needy, it scares guys away and makes him think you’re going to suffocate him. It’s easy to be enthusiastic about someone you like. Just back off and let him do some of the driving. Men like to pursue.

Read More: 10 Ways You’re Making Him PANIC (And Back Away From Your Relationship)

Is He Afraid?

Laura

If Your Man is Like a Cat-Back Exhaust System, You’re In Luck

In dating, dating advice, men, relationships on March 29, 2017 at 7:09 pm

I never thought I would know anything about cars or men.

Actually, it’s debatable how much I know about the XX species—and I’m still learning about cars.

For a new job of mine, I’ve had to learn a lot about cars, trucks, performance driving, off-roading and then some. If you know me, you already know that all that stuff is Greek to me. But I’m a good student and hate to look stupid, so I’ve been doing my research. When it comes to men, I’ve made stupid mistakes sometimes, and I’m learning too—a work in progress trying to understand the sexy, mysterious and sometimes incredibly weird species, called males. Let’s just say…I have been researching men since age 3 and so far, I’ve yet to find that one guy that can capture me and throw me into his man cave for eternity.

But the other day, I had to write about Cat Back Exhaust Systems, and it made me think of men.

First of all, I knew zilch about exhaust systems, much less what a “cat” had to do with any of it.

But as I read on about mufflers, resonators, and horsepower, I realized that a man’s love or lack thereof, can be compared easily to a Cat Back.

Read the rest of this entry »

An Offer I Can’t Refuse: Dating & Hunting

In dating, dating advice, love, relationships on March 27, 2017 at 4:03 pm

The other day a friend of mine said, “All of a sudden the guys are coming out of the woodwork!” She had had a few good dates…and it seemed all the ex’s were popping up out of nowhere, randomly…and at once.

It’s always the case—for women at least…is it the same for men? I’m not sure. Guys—you’ll have to tell me.

Why is it that men seem to all come rushing for you at once, when just a month or even days ago, nobody had “boo” to say to you?

It’s the hunt.

Men smell when you don’t want them, need them or have forgotten them.

And then suddenly when they realize someone else is hunting you and you’re no longer an option to bring back to their cave,  men come around to mark their territory. Or at least try to. This isn’t to say guys pee on you—but you get the gist of it.

So for example, at the beginning of the year, I had quite a few dates. Two people I saw a few times…but nothing that rocked my world. Then suddenly—

Read the rest of this entry »

My Interview For Fox News on Financial Education for Women

In divorce, single mom, women's issues, work on March 21, 2017 at 1:12 am

When I decided to get a divorce, I was terrified. I was financially dependent and desperately trying to grow my income. Three years later, with a lot of hard work and sweat…I am doing it, thanks to the help of an amazing organization called Savvy Ladies.

Please watch this video and share. It could help a woman who is struggling in silence.

Watch the interview here.

With Hope,

Laura

10 Things You (Unknowingly) Do That Make Men Think You’re A HOT MESS

In dating advice, relationships on March 16, 2017 at 1:11 am

You may wonder why you keep getting ghosted after a few dates. Maybe it’s not that you can’t start a relationship, but that you find that you can’t sustain a relationship. To you, it must be that the “guys” are the ones with the problems, and of course, it takes two to tango.

But it may be that you’re really a mess and don’t even realize it.

You may be doing things that signal to your potential partners and partners that you’re a hot mess. You may not even be “so messy” but may instead have learned bad relationship and life habits. Or, perhaps, you are truly a trainwreck in heels.

Whatever the case may be, you’re signaling to guys that you are a bloody hot mess. Here are 10 signs you’re a hot mess that makes guys run for the hills.

Read More: 10 Things You (Unknowingly) Do That Make Men Think You’re A HOT MESS

Messy, Messy, Messy,

Laura

8 Stereotypes of Divorced Women

In divorce on March 12, 2017 at 3:35 am

Stereotypes exist for a reason they say, but it doesn’t mean that we should make judgments or pass assumptions based on some mythological stereotype. I wrote an article on stereotypes of divorced men, and so here are some of the stereotypes divorced women face each day…whether the experience is true or completely false for them. Instead of making assumptions that all divorces and divorced people act along “gendered lines,” we would really benefit if we could agree that divorce doesn’t look the same for anyone. I know not one single person that has my exact “divorce story,” and to recognize that divorce impacts people and children in different ways will only help us make new lives post-divorce, better…for all of us.

1- She’s a gold-digger

Not all divorcing women are rolling in alimony from their heads to their toes. Reality is some women pay their former spouses, not the other way around. People assume falsely so that not only will a woman “be financially okay,” but she’ll also make out big after her divorce, leaving her ex floundering.

That certainly isn’t my situation by any stretch of the imagination, nor is it many people I happen to know.

Read More: 8 Stereotypes of Divorced Women

 

Not Rolling In It,

Laura

Are These Divorce Men Stereotypes Fair?

In divorce, divorce advice, Uncategorized on February 27, 2017 at 6:10 pm

While some people certainly make stereotypes come to life, there are also a lot of unfair stereotypes in this world. In my own experience, my ex has fit the bill with some of the stereotypes you’ll see here…but many of my divorced friends and associates do not fall into these harsh and sometimes, untrue assumptions about divorced men. Not every woman or man who divorced is exactly how you imagine them– the money hungry ex-wife….the deadbeat ex-husband. Here are stereotypes that divorced men face each day—no matter how good a man he is…or not.

It was his fault

A lot of people assume the divorce was the man’s fault—at least initially. Obviously if people know a couple, they’ll have an idea of the “root” of the issues, but most times when I tell people I am divorced, they assume it was my ex’s fault. I’m not going to personally reveal the source of our divorce, but I am stating that many people assume the guy either was a cheater, jerk or the cause of the marital discord.

Read More: Are These Divorce Men Stereotypes Fair?

Stereotypes Lie in Falsehoods, Too…

Laura