I can’t make any definitive generalizations but, many men do enjoy chasing people that they are interested in. Some because they want to have many admirers, others because they like pursuing unavailable partners, and others simply because the chase validates the interest’s worth and makes the relationship feel like a victory. If he has to work to earn his love’s interest, it will feel like a valuable relationship worth investing in.
Some people are masters of the chase. And some people are masters of “being chased” and others not.
As much as it seems game-like and perhaps high school-esque, allowing a man to chase you is a great idea. Here are 4 things you can do to make him run:
1- Never ask him out
You can say you’d like to see him or you’re available but leave the effort to him.
If he likes you, he will ask you out. If he doesn’t, he won’t. All you did was put it out into the universe that you wouldn’t mind seeing him but you allowed him to do the work.
2- If he doesn’t want to go out with you, say ok
If he’s reluctant or avoids going out with you, accept it.
Begging or being too available is not worth it. If he wanted go out with you, he would.
Accepting his position will make you happier, I promise.
3- Don’t be too available– and see other people
Behave like a high-end department store. Only certain people can buy the high-priced goods. Do not act like a convenience story where you can drop everything at any moment for him.
Gay, straight, bi whatever– live your life, date others, make plans, have dreams and if he asks you out at a convenient time– great! If not, he’ll have to wait.
4-Invest in yourself. Repeatedly
Do you have a life? Do you have hobbies? Friends? Are you healthy? Are you confident?
If yes, that’s wonderful. Feeling worthwhile and owning your worth makes you a desirable catch.
At the same time, you don’t need to do everything he likes, get interested in everything he does, conform to whatever you think he would like.
Just be yourself and show him that he is not the priority. You are. If he wants to be a priority, he’ll have to work harder.
Good men (and women) will work to:
- Get to know you
- Earn your trust
- Win your affections
… in a positive and respectful way.
If you don’t– he won’t.
Raise the Bar,