What it Means to Really Appreciate a Friend, Family Member or Love

analise-benevides-3ZkYs1cTV20-unsplashPhoto by Analise Benevides on Unsplash

Appreciate:( Transitive Verb) to grasp the nature, worth or significance of; to value or admire; to recognize with gratitude; to be fully aware of; to judge with heightened perception or understanding.

Do you feel as if your person or love really knows how significant you are? Do your family and friends recognize you with gratitude?

Are you valued and admired by the people you love, whether it’s your spouse, friend or brother?

As much as “to love” is an action verb, appreciation requires effort as well although the technical definition is rather intellectual.

It’s an act of kindness and love to really appreciate someone, because no one comes without flaws and bad days. No one comes with happiness and joy, 24/7. This means that to appreciate someone, you must truly embrace and “grasp” the nature of that person– the good, the bad and the moody.

When you don’t feel appreciated, it can be really difficult. Who doesn’t want to feel valued or recognized with gratitude?

Here are the differences between someone who appreciates you and someone who doesn’t:

1. Values The Time With You VS. Takes You For Granted

Someone who appreciates you knows that any time he or she gets with you is precious. The person will look forward to seeing you and also, set aside the time to make sure that it’s quality time together. And if it can’t be a lot of time, the person will try to make up for it later. We all get busy.

Someone who takes you for granted and assumes you will always be around without making much effort towards you, does not appreciate you!

I saw this all the time when I was younger. Girls would string guys along because they liked them enough but not really, and so they just reached out if they needed them and when they didn’t, moved on to the next guy.

This person doesn’t see you as a special so he/she doesn’t make much effort at all because losing you as a friend or romantic partner wouldn’t really matter to this individual.

2. Gets You When You’re in Your Zone VS. Doesn’t Get You At All

Someone who appreciates you understands when you geek out (like I do) over dance class or a new pair of dance shoes.

Someone who appreciates you cheers you on as you run a marathon.

That person just generally knows what your goals are, what makes you happy and then does what he or she can as a family, friend or lover to help you achieve these things.

Someone who doesn’t get you will tsk-tsk your rantings on the new painting you’re working on or the new model car.

Someone who doesn’t get you will not support your goals and will sometimes, stand in your way.

3. Wants To Be Around You A Lot VS. Doesn’t Make Time For You
Someone who appreciates you wants to see you as consistently as possible and have you around.
This person invites you to family gatherings or if a love interest, wants to go on dates.
Someone who is always “busy” or always cancels or isn’t consistent, doesn’t appreciate you.
So, what happens when you feel unappreciated?
People Who Feel Unappreciated Will Often Be:
  • Sad/Depressed
  • Isolated– or, start to isolate themselves
  • Withdrawn
  • Doubtful
  • Anxious over intimacy and closeness

I hope whoever is in your life, friend, neighbor and partner truly appreciates you for all you have to offer. Each of us comes with different strengths and weaknesses and all deserve to have people who embrace us for this!

Peace, Love & Chocolate,


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