Category: dating advice

When You Realize Your Worth, You’ll Say Buh-BYE to Lazy Partners & Bad Offers

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There is nothing more joyous than owning your own happiness and realizing how worthy you are.

When you do, it suddenly becomes so easy to laugh off bad partners. To say goodbye to men or women who don’t appreciate you or your value. To not want someone who makes a crappy effort or half-ass effort to be in your life.

It just becomes clear overnight– yes, really— that you deserve better.

So, when your ex comes a calling with same lame offer to Netflix and chill or when some guy or gal who doesn’t really appreciate you wants to hang out– but not commit to you or date and show you how important you are to them–

It’s easy to say, “Thanks, but no thanks.”

For me, there is only one relationship, one situation worth entering into:

The one where the person really makes an effort, is excited to see me and be with me and enjoys being with me.

I am not interested in situationships. I am not interested in being someone’s option. I am not interested in being your or anyone’s friend with benefits.

I am only interested in someone who sees spending time with me as enjoyable and a MUST. Someone who really likes me and finds me fun to be around and wants to get to know me better.

Someone who knows how to ask someone on a date and follow through. Someone who is a good friend, too and caring.

Someone who sees my VALUE. Someone who sees me as so valuable, that he appreciates any second of my time.

That is all I am interested in.

Everyone else, can take their offers elsewhere. My price tag will not be on sale or reduced.

K? Thx. Bye,

Laura

 

Someone Who Deserves You

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Someone who deserves you …

Feels honored to be by your side.
Is proud of you.
Loves showing you off to friends and family and the world.

Shows you deep respect and care.

Is kind to you.

Wants to spend time with you and not just for his or her own needs.

Expresses love to you.

Works on him or herself to be the best person he or she can be— not just for you, but for themselves as well.

Doesn’t take you for granted.

Wants you to stick around.

Can’t imagine life without you.

Appreciates you and attempts to understand you.

Listens to you.

Makes the effort to be available to you.

❤️
Laura

Calling Someone Out on Their Cold Behavior Takes Guts

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I was excited to finally enjoy some alone time with a partner when the person announced he didn’t have any interest in seeing me.

Cold and heartless, I was so hurt.
There was nothing I had done wrong but this person had no desire to see me on the one chance I had free.

It was a glaring sign that this person not only didn’t care about me, but also thought very little of me and didn’t respect me.

I hit a wall. I had to call out the bad behavior because I had had enough.

The moral of the story? It’s hard to tell others how we feel but it’s necessary and when people are unkind and disrespectful , it’s necessary to say you’ve had enough.

Be Strong,

Laura

Why Giving Up & Deciding to Not Settle Anymore Is The Best Thing EVER

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Photo by Sami Hobbs on Unsplash

Climbing up a mountain is exhausting, but when you hit the top– it’s amazing!

However, when you’re with someone who doesn’t love or care about you while you try to make things work, it’s like you’re climbing a mountain constantly. That’s exhaustion with no reward.

It is really hard to give up on someone you love but if the person is constantly letting you down, never making you a priority, not caring about you, not there for you and not investing in you, giving up and deciding to not settle is the best thing you can do.

When you really look at your relationship, are you happy? Does the person love you and make you feel loved? Do they make you and the relationship a priority? Do you really matter and are you a pivotal part of this person’s life or does this person just take you for granted? Are you an option they pick “sometimes?” Do they keep you on the sidelines? Do they make you feel like #2,3 or 500?

If the answer is yes, what are you waiting for?

Give up trying to make someone appreciate you and love you. It’s exhausting work and not worth your time. I bet if you count up all the minutes YOU prioritized your relationship while counting up all the minutes he/she DIDN’T prioritize your relationship, I am pretty sure you’d see what I mean.

You deserve someone who values you and your relationship. You deserve someone who makes you #1.

Stop settling and roaming around the dirt, never getting the love you deserve.

Start shooting for the stars and get what is meant for you.

All My Love,

Laura

When You’ve Had Enough: The Last Straw

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So long, Mr./Mrs. Nice Guy! Even we nice people get to a point where we can’t handle being taken for granted. Even nice people get tired of people’s crap and tired when people let us down. We give you folks so many chances but at some point, even we say– “Enough is enough.”

Have you ever felt as if you’re always giving people a chance? Always being patient and understanding of their issues? Always hoping the best for them? Putting in the extra effort? Going the extra mile?

Yeah well, we nice people get tired of giving, giving and giving, while people take, take and take. We get tired of being “so understanding” of other’s issues. And doing our best to keep everyone happy– friends, partners, family, etc.

There comes a point when it’s the last straw– the last straw to break the camel’s back. When we’re tired of someone hurting us, letting us down and disappointing us.

When that time comes, you best believe that even nice people say– “Screw it.”

We withdraw everything! We withdraw our love, our care, our friendship, our respect and our time. We withdraw from caring about someone who doesn’t give a hoot about us. We say– “Enough is enough.”

And suddenly, we don’t care about you. We have no time for you. We have no patience, no love and no nothing for you.

Our goodwill and love has an expiration date– today. 2020.

Peace Out,

Laura

 

 

6 Things He/She Must Do If That Person Supposedly Cares About You

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If someone cares about you, he or she puts the money where his or her mouth is.

There are just certain things they have to do, otherwise that person is not worth it, not reliable and a flake.

And these things by the way, are non-negotiable.

1. Asks You Out

Random hangouts or late night get togethers aren’t a sign that someone cares about you. It’s a sign that someone views you as convenient.

If someone cares about you, that person will ask you out and make a plan. No BS. No “Maybe we’ll do something.” That person just asks you out!

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Why Someone Stopped Caring About You

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Ever wonder why someone stopped caring about you? Did you ever stop to think that maybe you took that person for granted and he or she got tired of feeling unappreciated, taken for granted and unloved?

Maybe that person got tired of you hurting them, essentially?

Here are some reasons that someone who was good, kind and loving finally got tired of you letting him or her down, and stopped caring about you:

You Never Showed Your Feelings

Did you act like you cared? Did you go out of your way to make this person feel loved? Or did you just assume the person would sit around and wait for you to give love back forever?

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When You Can’t Go Further in a Relationship Due to the Other Person

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Every relationship– friendship or romantic– has a path. Some are meant to go the distance and others, not so much. Some relationships– romantic ones– never even take off. And that I think, is the worst.

To fail at a relationship or marriage is really sad and challenging. Devastating. But to me, a relationship that never takes off is even worse.

There is the feeling that with a failed marriage or relationship, at least you got to try and give it your all. You can look back and say, “Sure, I made mistakes, but I still gave it my all most of the time.”

When you are with someone and feel the potential but it never comes to fruition, there is never that feeling of “I tried and failed– but hey! I tried!”

Instead, there is the feeling of “What if?” and “Why?”

“What happened?” and “What went wrong?”

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Socially Distant Dates: Are You Going on Them or Avoiding Altogether?

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It’s a very weird time to be single and I’ve spoken to quite a few people who all have a different take on single life during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Some people, have said they have taken a break from online dating altogether. The idea of managing online dating while dealing with their various circumstances during the pandemic is too much. Others don’t feel comfortable at all meeting even 6 feet apart and others still, find the video calling and potentially long waits of meeting in person not worth delving into online at this time.

Others have taken the circumstances to work to their advantage: I know quite a few people are meeting in parks or speaking to each other from porches or stoops.  Other people still, are video calling or chatting via phone before meeting either in person at a park or, when restrictions are lifted. Some relationships are even taking off: from a socially distant park meet up, to deciding to socially distance together, including the new person in their social circle of who they will interact with during this public health crisis. I have to say that having a buddy and partner must make this  whole isolation easier and I commend people for making it happen during such a bleak time.

There is a lot to consider before making a call like this:

  • How safe do you feel meeting someone in a park? Meeting during the day is the best bet in an active park. Make sure someone knows where you are, who you are meeting and what time you’ll be back.
  • How much protection will you use? Meaning, will you wear a mask or just keep your distance or both?
  • How willing are you to even meet someone at this time? Not willing? Very willing?
  • How ready are you to incorporate a new person into your life?

I would love to hear people’s stories, opinions and experiences in the comments!

You could help someone make that call– many people are on the fence about what to do during this time.

Lots of Love,

Laura

4 Signs Someone Isn’t Learning Life Lessons During Covid-19 Outbreak

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If you’re not growing and learning during this public health emergency, what exactly are you doing?
Some people seem to be missing the point of this challenging time. If you’re not getting the point — what is really important and what needs to be prioritized— you’re not learning.

Here are 4 signs you’re completely missing the point and learning nothing during this pandemic:

Lacking Commitment, Patience and Love for People Who Matter

If you can’t put down your issues and be present and available for the ones you love, you’re missing a big life lesson. If you can’t be patient with others ( and yourself) you’re also missing the point.
If you don’t prioritize someone now during this awful event— you have zero priorities.

Grumbling About When You’re Healthy

If you’re healthy, be grateful. Many people aren’t. It’s ok to be  upset about missing milestones and friends. It’s ok to be upset if you’re out of work. 

But if you’re missing the gratitude in being healthy, you’re missing the point.

Not Checking In on Loved Ones / Being an Absent Partner

Now is the time to check in however you can on loved ones from afar or in your home. Now is the time to be present. You’ll never have this kind of time at home again. Don’t make excuses. If you’re emotionally unavailable or checked out— you’ve got problems and you’re taking everyone for granted.

Being Hard on Yourself or Expecting Too Much of Others/ Oneself

Now is not the time to pressure yourself to be perfect or do fifty million things during a stressful pandemic. The same goes for others. Pressuring people or being hard on loved ones is not fair at this time. Be loving. Be patient. Be giving.

Be Safe!

Laura