An Offer I Can’t Refuse: Dating & Hunting

The other day a friend of mine said, “All of a sudden the guys are coming out of the woodwork!” She had had a few good dates…and it seemed all the ex’s were popping up out of nowhere, randomly…and at once.

It’s always the case—for women at least…is it the same for men? I’m not sure. Guys—you’ll have to tell me.

Why is it that men seem to all come rushing for you at once, when just a month or even days ago, nobody had “boo” to say to you?

It’s the hunt.

Men smell when you don’t want them, need them or have forgotten them.

And then suddenly when they realize someone else is hunting you and you’re no longer an option to bring back to their cave,  men come around to mark their territory. Or at least try to. This isn’t to say guys pee on you—but you get the gist of it.

So for example, at the beginning of the year, I had quite a few dates. Two people I saw a few times…but nothing that rocked my world. Then suddenly—

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Nervous About Meeting His Family Over the Holidays? Read This First

Meeting your partner’s family for the first time can be stressful, but then top it off with meeting them at the holidays, no less, and you’ve got a recipe for nerves. Before you decide to run away, break up, or pretend to be sick, put these tips in your back pocket, put on your best outfit and shoes, and you’ve got this!

1. Pick Your Most Comfortable and Polished Outfit

Now is not the time to choose those pants that you can’t quite zip up or put on that racy blouse, even if your honey loves it. Choose an outfit in which you feel comfortable and look good — even if you think it’s a little dull.

Also watch your shirtsleeves — when you’re nervous, you tend to sweat more than you typically do. Having a comfortable outfit will make you at least feel at ease.

Read More: Nervous About Meeting His Family Over the Holidays? Read This First

You’ll Do Just Fine,

Laura

9 Little Gestures That Mean, YES GIRL, He’s Into You

You met someone and you’re in the new stage in which you’re really not sure where you stand with him or where things are heading. So what happens next? It’s the game of love — or heartbreak.

You two do that dating tango: the dance in which you decide if you’re really in sync with each other or not. But before you decide to get on your metaphorical dancing shoes, pay attention to all of the little things.

It’s not the BIG huge gestures of affection and sweeping statements that really indicate a man is ready to say ‘I love you’. Talk is cheap. Anyone can say they love you (or is into you), but the reality is, it’s the little gestures a man does every day, on occasion, or on a whim that shows just how in love with you he is… or isn’t.

Here are the 9 little gestures that say ‘I love you’ without saying a word:

 

1. He fixes up the house.

If your new dude-to-potentially-be is offering to be Mr. Fixer Upper, chances are high that he’s “fixing” to score you as well. He wants to help take some of the DIY burden off your shoulders and give the place in which you dwell a lot of love. Why? Because he probably loves you, too, at least a little.

Read More: 9 Little Gestures That Mean, YES GIRL, He’s Into You

OH– He Wants You!

Laura

8 Signs He’s Not Just Having Sex With You, He Actually LIKES You

You’re super-excited about someone and your feelings are intense for them. The sex is off-the-charts hot. The connection is amazing. Waiting to see this person is torture. You cannot imagine another second without being in this man’s arms.

You’re so cooked and fried over this guy, we could call you a friggin’ hamburger. But is he sizzling over you? (Pardon me… all this talk about sex makes me hungry. Wink.)

Is this man crazy about you and serious about the relationship you’re forming? Or is it just about the sex for him, and the only real relationship that’s going on is the one inside your head? Here are eight signs he’s actually serious about your relationship and isn’t just in it for sex.

1. When the chips fall, he’s there to see you through.

If he’s serious about your relationship, when your car breaks down, you get sick, the cat dies or you have a huge blowout with someone in your family, he’s there. He’s there not because he’s forced to be, but because he cannot imagine leaving you alone.

He’s there because he’s invested in the time he spends with you and developing what you two share. He’s there because you need him, and that’s all he needs to know. If he’s not there for you, he’s only into you as a “curvy, sexy body.” Period.

Read More: 8 Signs He’s Not Just Having Sex With You, He Actually LIKES You

He’s Into You,

Laura

10 Body Language Secrets That Reveal He’s SUPER Into You

His body language doesn’t lie.

You met someone great. You’re wondering if he’s feeling the same but you’re afraid to ask. It might be too soon. You don’t want to lose your cool or seem desperate.

Here’s the good news: you can get the answer without asking. That’s right, it’s all in his body… body language, that is.

Instead of popping that awkward question of, “Dude, are you into me?” you can watch his torso, hands and other body parts to see if he’s totally down to be with you, or not.

Trust me, the body never lies. Unless of course, someone is under severe stress. In that case, it wouldn’t be a great time to start a relationship with someone or hop in the sack. Stress ruins bedroom performance anyway.

  1. His torso faces you.

If he’s talking to you and his upper body is squarely facing you, you might just be “his type of woman.” If he’s talking to you with his torso faced away from you, it’s probably a “just friends situation.”

Think of it this way: in the wild, do you think an animal looking to mate would have approached another animal sideways? I hate to be so basic but he will turn toward you if he’s looking to go in for the kill.

2. He plays with his hair.

Ladies like to twirl their hair when they’re feeling particularly anxious… or horny and ready to mate. Men aren’t much different. If he’s running his hands through his hair (unless he’s bald of course; or perhaps in that case, rubbing his head) and facing you, he may be thinking about mating himself.

Read More: 10 Body Language Secrets That Reveal He’s SUPER Into You

Pay Attention!

Laura

Do NOT Date Before the Divorce Is Finalized Until You Consider These Important Factors

You’re separated from your soon-to-be-former spouse, and now you’re wondering: is it acceptable for me to date? 

I wish I had an easy yes or no answer for you, but each situation is different. Some people may be available to date easily, and others? Not so much. There is one thing I can say with absolute certainty on the subject and that is this: whether you are divorcing with kids, without kids, or have been married a long time or simply a few years, no one is ready to be serious with ANYONE right after a separation.

Sure, you could be ready to have fun, have sex, and casually date, but you are no one’s Mrs. Right until you have taken time to assess yourself, your failed marriage, and where you are going in life. Not to mention, you need to heal. You may feel completely over someone, but the fact is it takes time to unravel yourself from a marriage.

Here are some indicators/rules you can go by to determine whether you are ready to casually date vs. whether you are not ready to casually date.

Read More: Do NOT Date Before the Divorce Is Finalized Until You Consider These Important Factors

It’s Not the Smartest Move,

Laura

5 Signs You’re Just Dating a Pen Pal

You match on Tinder, Happn, or Bumble and — bam! — the connection is hot! You can’t wait to meet. Your banter and messages are fun, playful, and interesting. The two of you cannot stop chatting away and you are starting to feel positive about this potential partner. It’s rare that it happens considering online dating and dating apps are a bit of a grind in which you sample a bunch of people but end up enjoying only a small fraction of the interactions you have with anyone. So this person is finally piquing your interest.

When is it time to get drinks or coffee? Now! But somehow, you still haven’t met this person yet . . .

1. Constant Texting but Never Direct Plans

The two of you say good morning and good night to each other, but there’s never a concrete plan to go out. You two never miss a day of chatting, but this person hasn’t mentioned a time to see you.

2. Your Requests Are Met With Excuses

You give in and ask the person to make a date, and your request is met with a bunch of excuses. Somehow this match always has work, friends to see, a sick family member, or “isn’t sure” of his/her schedule.

Read More: 5 Signs You’re Just Dating a Pen Pal

They’re Entertaining Their “Options,”

Laura

12 Things You Need to Know Before Dating a Single Mom

Before you get involved with a new partner, as a single mom you wish there were a few things you could tell these potential paramours bluntly, although laying it all on the line might be a bit intimidating! If there were a guide to explaining to your love interests the things that they should know before dating you, a single mom, this one would be it!

We Aren’t Desperate For Your Approval and Attention

Yes, we would like love in our lives and it stinks that the father of our child or other coparent is not the big love we may have hoped for, but we aren’t desperately posting on Craigslist for some guy to save us. Sure, after some of our marriages and relationships have dissolved, we may be lonely and wanting sex and companionship. But that’s anyone who has gone through a big breakup or divorce. At the end of the day, we are self-sufficient and aren’t looking for heroes, but for a partner who can pull his or her own weight.

Read More: 12 Things You Need to Know Before Dating a Single Mom

Not Your Mama,

Laura

Functional Vs. Dysfunctional Relationships: The 10 BIG Differences

Some people wouldn’t know a toxic relationship if it bit them in the ass. I’m always surprised how some people can float around in unstable relationships, not realizing that how the two of them interact is completely harmful. Most of the time, I would wager that when you feel bad about yourself or have grown up and experienced toxic people in your life, you often associate these behaviors as “normal” because it’s all you know.

But if you want to know if a relationship is functional or totally, utterly dysfunctional, here are the 10 big differences that clearly delineate the two.  See where your relationship lies.

  1. Stability 

Functional: A functional relationship is marked by stability. Stable moods between the couple. Stable relations. Stable commitment. Every relationship has moments of instability and mystery, but for the most part things will be smooth. Functional relationships command stability.

Dysfunctional: Constant ups and downs, and instability and uncertainty, are the true marks of a dysfunctional relationship.

Read More: Functional Vs. Dysfunctional Relationships: The 10 BIG Differences

Where Do You Two Lie?

Laura

8 Safety Tips You MUST Read Before Dating Online

When I heard the news about the murder of Ingrid Lyne, single mother of three children and Seattle resident, I was floored.

It could have been me.

Not that I know that monster who killed her or live in Seattle, but that I am a single mother looking for love online. It wasn’t the first date. The news reports states that they had been seeing each other for six to eight weeks. A new romance gone completely and utterly, devastatingly wrong. Should I then, single woman, step away from the dating apps and sites? My paranoia says yes — run away! But the reality is that monsters exist everywhere and anywhere and so, if women want to online date we must keep our heads about us and make smart choices when meeting strangers for the possibility of true love. Here are some tips to keep in mind after you’ve swiped right and decided to meet, face-to-face.

Read More: 8 Safety Tips You MUST Read Before Dating Online

 

Be Careful,

Laura