10 Life Lessons I Learned From Being Disappointed

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Photo by ZACHARY STAINES on Unsplash

This week I had a few people disappoint me.

Plus, it was one of the hardest weeks I have had in the past few months. It was the last thing I needed– to be disappointed. Actually, does anyone ever need to be disappointed? No, but this week I just felt I took a real beating. Every day I had like 5-10 challenges. I’ve been trying to be mindfully positive each day as a resolution, and let me tell you this week put me to the test.

So, I’m sitting here and trying to think about some of the life lessons and positive spins I learned from being disappointed– and from this crappy week in general– as a positive take on the whole past seven days. Hopefully it can help someone else going through a rough day or week or, who’s dealing with disappointment.

Everyone makes mistakes, so maybe the person you disappointed still tried his/her best

The person may have had good intentions but perhaps that didn’t come across. No one is perfect. Maybe the person felt he or she was doing the best possible thing for you, even if it wasn’t what you needed.

Being disappointed sometimes shows you who values you and who doesn’t

Someone who values you will try hard to be there for you. Someone who doesn’t is bound to let you down. At least you know now that the person doesn’t care or value you.

Now you know the person lacks feelings and care for you.

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The Real Bra Dictionary: From Asymmetrical to Minimizer & Beyond

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Photo by Fahad Waseem on Unsplash

The first bra I ever bought was in sixth grade. It was white, with a ribbon flower in the middle. Size 28AAA. I didn’t even need it.

I grew up in a house of women—three older sisters and my mother—practically drowning in bras and maxi pads. Wondering when it would be my turn to join the club, I did a few of those “must increase my bust” exercises, knowing full well they didn’t work but also figuring they couldn’t hurt. So when my best friend down the street showed me her new training bra, I refused to wait a second longer.

I stood in the driveway until my mom got home, blocking her car from the garage.

“This is serious business,” I told her.

Read More: The Real Bra Dictionary

Bras, Bras, Bras,

Laura

What Are Your Real Priorities? Check Yourself (& Others)

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Priorities. We all have priorities in our life. When people tell me they’re too busy, I secretly add in my head “because it’s not important.” When people decide something is important, they do it.

The same goes for you. If someone decides you are important, he or she will commit to you. The person will make time for you. The person will want to be with you. The person will have no lame excuses  as to why he or she isn’t available.

The same goes for “things.” If being healthy is important, people will make time to be healthy. If being kind is important, people will be kind.

Actions delineate priorities. This makes it easy to see who really cares about you.

People who would rather be with you then be with many partners or alone, care about you.

People who say they’d rather be alone or with many people, don’t give a flying f*ck about you.

Friends who show up when you need help, care.

Friends who reach out and want to connect with you, care.

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11 Things I Learned About Life & Love in 2019

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Photo by Amy Shamblen on Unsplash

There is only one week left in 2019, and what a year it has been! It ended a little crazy– but also, with many things to look forward to. Simply put, if you can’t take lessons from your year then what good is it to celebrate a new one?

Here are 11 things I learned in 2019– and will never forget.

Standing up for yourself is never a bad thing

It’s not always easy to speak out when someone does something wrong, but it is necessary.

As a mom, I am a role model for my kid. If I allow bad treatment to happen or sit back and do nothing when I could make a positive difference, that’s not setting the right tone.

Breathe–your journey is not going to be the same as others

Your timeline will be very unique from everyone else’s. Even when it seems like everyone else on the planet has done something or hit a life goal in the same linear fashion, and you haven”t.

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6 Things to Consider Before Moving

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Photo by Erda Estremera on Unsplash

Making a move can be very scary. It can be hard to make the change, especially if you thought your current home would be a forever place or circumstances like divorce, breaking up or a job change force you into a move.

And if you’re on the fence about a move and mulling it over, pulling the trigger can also be hard. Here are some things to consider when debating to move … or not.

Will it Further Your Career in a Significant Way?

If moving will elevate you to the next level, do it! These opportunities only come around once in a lifetime.  You may not have the same opportunity again.

This is especially key if it will lift your salary in a big way.

Will it Help You Heal?

If you move, will you heal a divorce or break-up?

Or will you be just as sad or hurting if you leave?

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Will You Be Remembered as a Good Person?

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“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”– Maya Angelou

On a daily basis, we do “things.” Some of these things are mistakes or bad choices. Some of these things are good choices and decisions. We interact with so many people on a daily basis, leaving powerful impressions behind on each person we speak to or even just look at!

How are we making these people feel? Are we leaving impressions of goodness or are we leaving them feeling annoyed, angry, hurt or disgusted?

And on a greater scale–when our time on this planet is done, how will you have left the people you loved behind? Will you have left them with good, positive feelings? Will you have left them remembering all the negative ways you made them feel? Will they remember you as a loving person who made them feel cared for?

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When Nothing Gets Easier & Everything Gets Harder, Even The Strong Need Support

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Photo by Ian Stauffer on Unsplash

One of the hardest things about being the youngest of four kids with a large age gap between me and the other 3 kids, is that my parents are older and unable to support me and be there for me in the way I wish they could. I understand why they can’t though, especially with my mom’s health issues, but it is still hard. They root for me on the sidelines, but because they are dealing with a lot– I cannot at their age ask for too much. In fact, I try to give instead of take when it comes to them. They paid their dues in their eighties to be helped instead of burdened.

Still, it makes it really challenging– especially when going through a very hard situation knowing that they can’t physically be there for me.

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Feeling Left Out & Alone From the Fa-La-La’s: Holiday Blues

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I have a lot of friends– most of which I would say are good, close friends, but it is hard for me to not feel a bit lonely amongst all the holiday cheer. Perhaps it’s that my family members have grown and gone many different ways. Some of which are not well and able to celebrate very much. Perhaps it’s being single for so long. Perhaps it’s living in a town where everyone is so closely knit and I am still relatively new. Perhaps it’s that some of the old traditions we have I couldn’t afford to do OR, that my kid was sick and we missed out on two festive things.

Or maybe it’s just me. Maybe not.

What do you do when you feel like the holiday cheer is so loud and you are lost amongst it? It is hard to not feel disappointed and sad because the most wonderful time of the year really can be so wonderful. Why wouldn’t you want to enjoy?

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6 Ways to Hide You’re Hurting When You Can’t Be Real

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Photo by Sami Hobbs on Unsplash

It’s not easy keeping it together if you are feeling depressed or going through some serious life stuff. A biggest part of the challenge is hiding it.

Sure, maybe you have people you can come clean with, but for the most part, adult life is going through the motions without showing the “emotions”– unless you trust someone and let your guard down. I’m not saying you should fake it and not get help. If you are depressed, you should get help. But what I am saying, is sometimes you have to keep it together when you’re out in public or in a situation that demands privacy.

Here are some tips for keeping cool when really, you need a hug and a break.

1. Steer conversations towards other people

Avoid questions and have the person talk about him or herself. Most people like to do that!

2. Take time outs

Take a mental health day. Go for a walk. Hide out for a while and work in a different location in the office.

3. Say, “I’d rather not…”

Discuss it. When people ask if you are upset, you can decline talking– and find someone you trust to vent to.

4. Take a drive and cry

If your kids can’t see you cry or you just need to let it out, blast some music and cry a bit. Just watch the road.

5. Can say you’re fine

Not ready to talk to someone about your hurt feelings? Say you’re fine and wait for a time when you’re more composed.

6. Exercise, meditate or dance

Move. Move and mooove. Put your sadness or stress into the motions.

 

Chin up– hang tight– and hope for the best,

Laura

 

 

9 Signs of Serious Depression at the Holidays

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Photo by Warren Wong on Unsplash

Suicide Prevention Month is technically September but with the holidays rolling around, I thought it might be helpful to talk about it now. Many people feel alone, worthless and stressed at this time of year.

It’s not unusual for people to hit a rock bottom during this time of year. Unfortunately, I have known a few people (mostly from a distance) that took a turn for the worse right around Thanksgiving and Christmas.

So, I figured I might compile a list of some symptoms of serious depression so you can all keep an eye on your loved ones or yourselves if needed. A person very close to me lost someone she loved to suicide and it was and is, an unending wound. Hug your loved ones tightly this season and be the supportive ear that person might need!

9 Signs of Serious Depression– Especially at the Holidays

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