6 Things You Must Do to Be a Good Partner

It doesn’t matter if you’re young or old, gay or straight or bi or any other orientation. It doesn’t matter if you are never married, married twice or newly divorced.

If you want to get love from someone, you have to give back of yourself.

Relationships shouldn’t be one-sided; they are reciprocal arrangements where both people get to exist happily according to each other’s various needs.

These are the 6 key things you must have and give to be a good partner.

Let’s get started:

1. Must be giving: you cannot take constantly or be selfish. However, in each relationship there are times where one person can be more selfish than the other and vice versa. This is “okay” as long as it is balanced in the long run and both parties feel validated.

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The Recipe for a Great Relationship

The recipe of a good partner is a mix of connection, chemistry, dedication and direction.

Connection— the feeling of closeness, comfort and unity.

Chemistry– the feeling of passion and desire.

Dedication– the act of continuous care, collaboration and work.

Direction– is the act of taking your connection, chemistry and dedication for each other forward.

Without a good dose of all of these ingredients combined, your relationship will lack.

Can you imagine a partner with chemistry but has no dedication or direction? What about a partner that has dedication with no chemistry?

To really have love take off, you need the right mix, but which ingredient is more important than the other?

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That Moment When You Realize You Deserve More

There is no moment more magical than the moment where you realize you deserve more. Better. The best.

The only moment more magical would be meeting someone you love and cherish. The first time you set eyes on that person.

But the moment when you realize that you’re getting shortchanged and deserve better is a pivotal moment.

Because two things can happen in that moment:

1- You commit to demanding better for yourself OR

2- You recognize you deserve better, but keep living the same damn way.

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Life Tip: Women Want to Hear How You Feel

Men ask me for advice rather frequently about the ladies. And one of the biggest things I always say is to tell her how you feel.
Every woman and person is different, but there are quite a few of us who really love to get that verbal affirmation from our partner. If you’ve ever looked into the 5 love languages, then you know what I mean. If you haven’t– verbal affirmation is a love style; people who have this preference enjoy hearing their partners express their feelings, getting praise or  hearing expressions of love from their mates.

For me, this is one of my strong love styles.

So, if you are a man who can’t or won’t express how he feels and you meet a woman who needs this, you are in deep, deep poop.

Here is why:

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Are You Happy or Just Settling?

Have you done a recent check on your relationship and how it’s going? Are you feeling like perhaps your relationship is missing something or like you’re missing something?

Does it feel like you’re truly loved in the way you need to be loved?

If you’re struggling and unsure if you are really demanding the best of others or, taking whatever you can get– use  these tips to get some clarity.

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If You’re Feeling Defeated in Love or Life, Read This

There is no worse feeling than defeat. That feeling when you have tried really hard to be your best you, repair a relationship family or romantic, reach a goal or what have you, and you failed.

Failure is devastating but to me, defeat is worse. Failure at least implies courage and an attempt made.

Defeat is pure loss.

It’s the relationship that didn’t work out. The dream that died. The reparations not repaired. The goal not reached.

When you feel defeated, how do you get back up again and believe in yourself when it feels impossible?

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How to Tell If You Are Really Valued or, Taken for Granted

There is a clear difference between people who value you and people who take you for granted, yet sometimes when we are vulnerable, not confident or naive, we miss these clear signs.

A lot of the time, I see women and men being taken for granted when they are already in a vulnerable state and can’t see the writing on the wall until it’s too late.

To prevent anyone from getting hurt, I’ve made a little quick ‘Go-to Guide’ to help you see clearly.  Maybe I can prevent a few heartaches.

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What to Do When Someone Won’t Commit

There is no greater pain than love and commitment not returned or worse, retracted.

It is very easy to blame yourself for this person’s state of mind and feeling. It is very easy to retreat into your pain.

But, here are a few things you should do when dealing with someone who can’t commit to save your sanity:

1. Remember It’s Not You– It’s Them

 The person has issues with commitment that probably have nothing to do with you. You have no idea what the person may have experienced prior to meeting you. That person could be a mess. Maybe they don’t know good love from bad love.

And even if it’s you like, say you aren’t a match for them or they don’t love you back … it doesn’t mean you aren’t a match for someone else.

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6 Lessons I Learned About Love Thanks To Eighties Music Videos

I watched an abnormally amount of MTV as a child so I suppose it’s rather cool that I ended up an MTV personality back in the day. But, what I really learned from all those logged hours of RUN DMC videos, 120 Minutes, Head Bangers Ball, and Yo! MTV Raps goes beyond my love of music and straight to lessons I learned about love via the music video. I’m not saying that these lessons or “key points” were always the sanest tips on love, but that I was an impressionable young mind getting interesting impressions, to say the least!

Grab Your Love Interest’s Attention By Any Means Necessary

Okay, so writhing and doing a split on one or two cars— the split between the two vehicles is even more creative—seems a little out there, no? But Tawny Kitaen certainly made a point in Whitesnake’s “Here I Go Again,” video: if you want to catch your love’s eye, you better stop traffic. Literally. Being a wallflower won’t get you anywhere, for the most part, in love.

Read More: 6 Lessons I Learned About Love Thanks To Eighties Music Videos

Rock On,

Laura

The Most Important Thing to Look For in a Partner as a Single Man or Woman

As you’re swiping, scoping or chatting with potential partners, I bet the first two things that strike you are:

  • The person’s looks
  • The person’s attitude

After you’ve assessed those two basic things, you drill down into the nitty gritty– especially if you’re a single parent dating:

  • Do they have kids? If yes, do they see them often. If no, do they want kids?
  • Were they married? Do they want to get married again?
  • What do they do for work?
  • What’s the person’s lifestyle like?
  • What are the person’s goals for the next year or so?
  • Where do they live? Is it far from you? Do they live on their own or with other people?

All of these things give you an idea of whether you’ll want to date them– or not. And truly, they are all important factors but after it’s all said and done and you’ve found someone who fits the bill on all of the previously mentioned factors– consider this one single most important thing you should look for in a partner:

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