Someone Who Deserves You

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https://unsplash.com/@chermitovee

Someone who deserves you …

Feels honored to be by your side.
Is proud of you.
Loves showing you off to friends and family and the world.

Shows you deep respect and care.

Is kind to you.

Wants to spend time with you and not just for his or her own needs.

Expresses love to you.

Works on him or herself to be the best person he or she can be— not just for you, but for themselves as well.

Doesn’t take you for granted.

Wants you to stick around.

Can’t imagine life without you.

Appreciates you and attempts to understand you.

Listens to you.

Makes the effort to be available to you.

❤️
Laura

They’re Taking & You’re Giving: Stop Doing All The Work in the Relationship

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Photo by Victor Freitas on Unsplash

If you feel like you’re carrying all the weight in your relationship, guess what?

You probably are!

Why should you do all the work, give and give and give, while someone else takes and does relatively little?

If this is you– doing all the heavy lifting to keep your relationship running– STOP.

Successful relationships require two people working together. If you’re the one offering yourself up all the time and killing yourself to keep it going while the other person makes zero to little effort, you’re doing it all wrong.

No one should be doing all the giving, loving, sweating and heavy work of the relationship alone.

No one should be taking whatever is given to him or her, while doing nothing or, not much at all.

There will always be times when your relationship will not be equal. One person will do more giving and the other, more taking, but this shouldn’t be a constant. If it is, stop giving and start demanding more of the person you are with. You deserve to take as much as you give.

Much Love,

Laura

When Someone Wastes Your Time

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https://unsplash.com/@jontyson

There is nothing more frustrating when someone wastes your time while you put all your effort and energy into them. My last relationship the person was not as invested as I was. I put in 150% of my heart and time and the other person put in about 30%. I felt as if I did all the heavy lifting while this person had a walk-on role in our relationship. I guess the relationship didn’t matter to this person at all because as we all know, effort = how much someone cares.

The frustration I felt doing everything while the other person sat back and did the minimum, bothers me to no end.

How hurtful can someone be to watch someone else bust his or her butt to get the relationship going while he or she does barely anything?

After going through that, I realize I will never be dumb again.  I gave too much of myself to someone who didn’t appreciate me and took me for granted.

Don’t Do All the Work!!
Laura

 

 

 

This Man or Woman Doesn’t Care, So Don’t Waste Your Time

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https://unsplash.com/@louishansel

Avoid these types of men or women or whatever gender, to date because otherwise, you will waste time on someone who never cared about you in the first place. From my own experiences to my friends’ experiences, be wise:

Avoid Dating Someone Who Wants to Change Your Views or Religion

Someone who is never happy with your views or ways of worship or spirituality is going to be tough down the line. It’s ok if the person wants you to open up a bit to his or her way of thinking, but not if the person is trying to change you. This will end up a total nightmare for you where you’ll never feel accepted and loved. You will always feel out of the loop and not validated.

Avoid Dating Someone Who Won’t Commit and Has a Load of Excuses Why

Don’t date the man or woman who won’t commit and yet, likes you enough to sleep with you sometimes or see you sometimes. Why? Because he or she will be around. SOMETIMES. On his or her terms and when that person feels up to it. They’ll say they care about you but then their words are never backed up. They will always disappoint you because they don’t care about you or want you enough to change. Guess who will be left crying? You and not them.  This person doesn’t care about you at all. If he can’t introduce you to friends or she won’t move the relationship forward, then that person is just messing with your heart and wasting time. You’re not good enough for them in their eyes, so move it along before you regret it.

Avoid Dating the Money Hungry or Demanding Who Doesn’t Appreciate Anything

Time and again I’ve seen friends suffer over the person who always wants more and is never happy. They feel like they don’t do enough yet it’s really the greedy person who is the problem. If someone is constantly demanding you do more and never happy with you, or constantly wants you to spend money— that person is impossible. Don’t bother!

Trust Me,

L

Calling Someone Out on Their Cold Behavior Takes Guts

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I was excited to finally enjoy some alone time with a partner when the person announced he didn’t have any interest in seeing me.

Cold and heartless, I was so hurt.
There was nothing I had done wrong but this person had no desire to see me on the one chance I had free.

It was a glaring sign that this person not only didn’t care about me, but also thought very little of me and didn’t respect me.

I hit a wall. I had to call out the bad behavior because I had had enough.

The moral of the story? It’s hard to tell others how we feel but it’s necessary and when people are unkind and disrespectful , it’s necessary to say you’ve had enough.

Be Strong,

Laura

When Your Partner Misses Free Time, Birthdays, Milestones & More

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Photo by Sofiya Levchenko on Unsplash

It’s your birthday and your partner is working late. Again.

You have a free weekend after being so busy with the kids and work and your partner has something to do. Again.

You need a ride to the doctor’s for a procedure. Your partner is busy, unavailable or what have you. Again.

You want to see a show (back when concerts were allowed) or attend a party (same!), but your partner is busy, doesn’t feel like going or has something better to do. Again.

It gets lonely when the one person you love so much never shows up for you to celebrate with you or spend significant time together.

It eats away at your feelings and trust for your partner. You start to feel more alone by the minute and depressed.

It’s happened to me where I’ve felt so isolated and alone despite  having someone around who “supposedly” cared about me.

It felt like a party for one constantly. Never there for me. Me doing everything alone constantly or with friends without him. Me feeling unloved constantly.  Me feeling like maybe it was me. Maybe I wasn’t worth spending time with or maybe I wasn’t any good. Maybe I was not worth loving. Maybe I had nothing to offer.

I started to get used to being alone and lived my life without him to the fullest, but it always hurt and always felt like an insult to my character.  I got used to the constant disappointment.

People wondered why I was always alone. I couldn’t explain it but it hurt like the worst hell.

If someone leaves you to attend the party of your life alone, leave him or her now.

You deserve to eat cake for two. You shouldn’t be spending parties, weekends and milestones alone. You shouldn’t be in a relationship or marriage feeling lonely all the time. You should have a partner who looks forward to being with you and makes time for you.

Lovingly,

Laura

Why Giving Up & Deciding to Not Settle Anymore Is The Best Thing EVER

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Photo by Sami Hobbs on Unsplash

Climbing up a mountain is exhausting, but when you hit the top– it’s amazing!

However, when you’re with someone who doesn’t love or care about you while you try to make things work, it’s like you’re climbing a mountain constantly. That’s exhaustion with no reward.

It is really hard to give up on someone you love but if the person is constantly letting you down, never making you a priority, not caring about you, not there for you and not investing in you, giving up and deciding to not settle is the best thing you can do.

When you really look at your relationship, are you happy? Does the person love you and make you feel loved? Do they make you and the relationship a priority? Do you really matter and are you a pivotal part of this person’s life or does this person just take you for granted? Are you an option they pick “sometimes?” Do they keep you on the sidelines? Do they make you feel like #2,3 or 500?

If the answer is yes, what are you waiting for?

Give up trying to make someone appreciate you and love you. It’s exhausting work and not worth your time. I bet if you count up all the minutes YOU prioritized your relationship while counting up all the minutes he/she DIDN’T prioritize your relationship, I am pretty sure you’d see what I mean.

You deserve someone who values you and your relationship. You deserve someone who makes you #1.

Stop settling and roaming around the dirt, never getting the love you deserve.

Start shooting for the stars and get what is meant for you.

All My Love,

Laura

When You’ve Had Enough: The Last Straw

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Photo by Meghan Rodgers on Unsplash

So long, Mr./Mrs. Nice Guy! Even we nice people get to a point where we can’t handle being taken for granted. Even nice people get tired of people’s crap and tired when people let us down. We give you folks so many chances but at some point, even we say– “Enough is enough.”

Have you ever felt as if you’re always giving people a chance? Always being patient and understanding of their issues? Always hoping the best for them? Putting in the extra effort? Going the extra mile?

Yeah well, we nice people get tired of giving, giving and giving, while people take, take and take. We get tired of being “so understanding” of other’s issues. And doing our best to keep everyone happy– friends, partners, family, etc.

There comes a point when it’s the last straw– the last straw to break the camel’s back. When we’re tired of someone hurting us, letting us down and disappointing us.

When that time comes, you best believe that even nice people say– “Screw it.”

We withdraw everything! We withdraw our love, our care, our friendship, our respect and our time. We withdraw from caring about someone who doesn’t give a hoot about us. We say– “Enough is enough.”

And suddenly, we don’t care about you. We have no time for you. We have no patience, no love and no nothing for you.

Our goodwill and love has an expiration date– today. 2020.

Peace Out,

Laura

 

 

Is Your Love a 100 or a 0? Loving Actions Add Up!

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Photo by Bernard Hermant on Unsplash

This is a trying time for everyone, regardless of your class, ethnicity, marital status, etc.

So, under these trying times, is your partner or love interest taking time to be loving with positive actions? Are you taking time to be loving? Is your love interest available and considerate of your feelings?

Here are a few things that add up in a positive way. If your partner or love interest isn’t doing these things, he or she isn’t “adding” up to much.

Continue reading

4 Signs Someone Isn’t Learning Life Lessons During Covid-19 Outbreak

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https://unsplash.com/@element5digital

If you’re not growing and learning during this public health emergency, what exactly are you doing?
Some people seem to be missing the point of this challenging time. If you’re not getting the point — what is really important and what needs to be prioritized— you’re not learning.

Here are 4 signs you’re completely missing the point and learning nothing during this pandemic:

Lacking Commitment, Patience and Love for People Who Matter

If you can’t put down your issues and be present and available for the ones you love, you’re missing a big life lesson. If you can’t be patient with others ( and yourself) you’re also missing the point.
If you don’t prioritize someone now during this awful event— you have zero priorities.

Grumbling About When You’re Healthy

If you’re healthy, be grateful. Many people aren’t. It’s ok to be  upset about missing milestones and friends. It’s ok to be upset if you’re out of work. 

But if you’re missing the gratitude in being healthy, you’re missing the point.

Not Checking In on Loved Ones / Being an Absent Partner

Now is the time to check in however you can on loved ones from afar or in your home. Now is the time to be present. You’ll never have this kind of time at home again. Don’t make excuses. If you’re emotionally unavailable or checked out— you’ve got problems and you’re taking everyone for granted.

Being Hard on Yourself or Expecting Too Much of Others/ Oneself

Now is not the time to pressure yourself to be perfect or do fifty million things during a stressful pandemic. The same goes for others. Pressuring people or being hard on loved ones is not fair at this time. Be loving. Be patient. Be giving.

Be Safe!

Laura