Is He/She Stringing You Along? Are You His/ Her Option?

thomas-q-PrfRxwXdhXE-unsplashPhoto by Thomas Q on Unsplash

Your relationship– or developing relationship– is a priority to you … but it doesn’t always feel like it is to her. You sometimes feel as if you’re an option or second best to this person’s other life outside of you … but maybe you’re just sensitive.

Been there, done that– and here are a few signs someone is stringing you along and thinking of you as an option:

Makes Plans Last Minute

Does he always ask you out last minute?

Does she suddenly have availability?

Stringing you along…

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Someone Who Really Loves You Will Never Let Go of You

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Photo by David Hofmann on Unsplash

Someone who truly cherishes and desires you will never let go of you. He or she will never choose the other “green grass.” That person will never try to forcibly change you or dodge/avoid committing to you.

That person will want you as you are, and want to give him or herself to you completely.

This doesn’t mean this person will be perfect or constantly the epitome of a “perfect partner.”

What it means is this person will be imperfect, but true to you. This person will be flawed, but always, trying to have you near him or her. This person will work hard to be a better person because you inspire him or her to be better!

This person will inspire you to be better!

This person will not dilly-dally or risk losing you.

This person will come forth with all the good intentions you can imagine, trying to get a chance to be loved and known by you.

Not because the person is a crazy stalker– but because the person truly sees all you have to offer and wants so much to have you be a part of his or her life and story.

That person wants you to join him or her in this crazy dance called life. For the slow parts– the quick parts. The interlude. For every movement and tempo and every type of song, this person knows you are the music to which his or her heart beats and goes.

Without you, life is not the same.

You will meet someone who will want so much to dance next to you and be with you in this life.

Do not doubt it.

It’s a promise. Not an “If” but a “when.”

Dance On,

Laura

6 Things You Must Do to Be a Good Partner

It doesn’t matter if you’re young or old, gay or straight or bi or any other orientation. It doesn’t matter if you are never married, married twice or newly divorced.

If you want to get love from someone, you have to give back of yourself.

Relationships shouldn’t be one-sided; they are reciprocal arrangements where both people get to exist happily according to each other’s various needs.

These are the 6 key things you must have and give to be a good partner.

Let’s get started:

1. Must be giving: you cannot take constantly or be selfish. However, in each relationship there are times where one person can be more selfish than the other and vice versa. This is “okay” as long as it is balanced in the long run and both parties feel validated.

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What It Might Mean If You’re Crying For No Reason

There are many times when I’ve seen someone else, or have myself, burst into tears. Let’s just say pregnancy comes with a lot of teary showers for nine months. And then, postpartum? Those first few days after giving birth, I cried lots of happy, emotional, and exhausted tears.

Even if it may appear on the outside as if you have no reason to cry, we often internally know exactly why we’ve got major tears and are crying for no reason. Some cry when they get mad, and others cry when they’re PMSing. It’s not unusual to cry due to hormonal changes, and exhaustion can also make someone burst into tears. You name it, the list can roll on.

But I was curious to see what experts in the psychology field had to say about people who find themselves crying for no reason and burst into tears without explanation. Here’s what they had to say.

Read More: What It Might Mean If You’re Crying For No Reason

Wipe Those Tears,

Laura

I’m a Type A: Here’s What I Could Learn From Type B’s

Ever since I was little, I have always had a strong personality and Type A ways. Not extremely Type A, like ironing my curtains or heading up every PTO class, but Type A as in as a child, I secretly (and quietly in my head) hated when people put my toys back in the wrong spot and as an adult, I am very organized and rely on to-do lists, reminders and documents to keep me on track and progressing.

In my life, this has benefited me in many ways. I managed my life as a comedian and actress for a long time because of this. I excelled in college due to my personality traits. And as a single mom, I have picked myself up and dusted myself off with my guts, determination, organizational skills, and direction. This has helped me infinitely in terms of adjusting to life with just me and my little one.

Read More: I’m a Type A: Here’s What I Could Learn From Type B’s

Always Learning,

Laura

6 Lessons Learned on My Three-Year Divorce Anniversary

Very shortly, it will be 3 years since my divorce date and over 5 years since I have been separated from my ex-husband. As it gets close to that date each year which also is right next to our wedding anniversary ironically, I always reflect on the trials, wins, and growth I’ve made in that time. In some ways, I always find myself a bit short of where I want to be, and in other ways, I always find that I’ve surpassed my expectations. Now that it’s almost three years out, here’s what I’ve learned, where I’ve been, and where I’m headed.

1. DOING THE RIGHT THING ALWAYS PAYS OFF

There were many times when it came to my ex or things involving him where friends would say I was “too nice” or going out of my way.
This isn’t to say that I always did the right thing each time, but that overall, I usually tried to do the right thing.

Read More: 6 Lessons Learned on My Three-Year Divorce Anniversary

Growing,

Laura

7 Ways to Create New Holiday Traditions After Your Divorce

Okay, so you’re divorced and now you’ve got to figure out the holidays…on your own or with the kids. It can take adjusting. Missing your ex (or maybe not!). Missing your ex’s family unless you still see them…or also, maybe not. Sharing your kids. Being alone. Less money. Being single.

It’s not surprising if you’re already feeling a little grinchy and not so spirited. But—and here is the challenge—even if you don’t have your kids…they’re watching you before they walk off to the other parent’s home. So you’ve got to shake off the holiday blues and make different memories and traditions that they will love, and so will you.

Or in other words, your divorce is not a death sentence. It just means some adjustments have to be made for you to find a new happy normal! Here are some holly jolly ways to create new traditions at the holidays after divorce.

Read More: 7 Ways to Create New Holiday Traditions After Your Divorce

Embrace the New,

Laura

4 Perspectives to Embrace When Supporting Your Kids After Divorce

Our children are bystanders in the divorce process. Theyoverave no control in the matter and can often just sit or stand by and watch as their families change, drastically. Depending on the age of the child and the child’s individual personality, some kids will roll with divorce more easily than others. Not to mention, a child will fare better and come out happy despite divorce if the two parents are both active parents who for the most part, get along. This doesn’t mean you and your former spouse have to be “BFF’s,” but that the more you get along, the easier it is in general.

Keeping this in mind that our children are bystanders and the “audience” of the whole divorce debacle, how can we minimize the negative impacts a divorce can bring? Because our kids aren’t part of a passive audience: the divorce changes their lives in many ways.

Whether you’re separating, newly divorced or an old seasoned “pro” at divorce, keep in mind these 4 perspectives when parenting children after divorce.

Read More: 4 Perspectives to Embrace When Supporting Your Kids After Divorce

Support Them,

Laura

 

5 People to Say Goodbye to When You Hit Your Forties

In your twenties, you get to know people outside of your home and community. You get a feel for the world and what society is like. You have usually a diverse group of friends or at least acquaintances, and you’ve got more time to mingle. When you hit your thirties, you’ve solidified much of your core social group or if not, you’re about to do just that. You’re letting your social circle get smaller and at the same time if you get married and or have children, your circle also changes. This change is major. Your social circle is tight and if it’s not that’s a big issue.

To be frank, as a woman, if you don’t have at least one great girlfriend you can count on in your thirties, I implore you to get out there and make one—now!

You are missing out. Sure, guy friends are nice, but truly… a woman needs a few amazing girlfriends, always.

Okay, now that I’ve emphasized the importance of having great girlfriends, what happens to your social circle when you hit your forties?

Read More: 5 People to Say Goodbye to When You Hit Your Forties

Bye-Bye,

Laura

10 Marriage Tips From an Ex-Spouse Who Has Been There

As someone who was once married and now isn’t, I can say that even though I believe there was nothing that could have possibly saved my former marriage, I still think there are things I learned about marriage that I will carry with me to the next relationship. What good is life if you can’t learn lessons from it? Well, my marriage taught me a lot about me, a lot about what I want from someone, and a lot about what I need from someone (and have to give) in order to have a happy marriage the next go-round. Here are 10 marriage tips from an ex-spouse who has been there and done that.

1- Choose your words carefully . . . saying harsh words will only tear apart the marriage.

Read the rest at PopSugar!

Choose Your Battles Wisely,

Laura