6 Changes You May Hit in Your Forties That No One Talks About

The forties are the “me” decade. You awkwardly stumbled, twirled and partially danced through your twenties. Gained your footing and planted seeds for your life in your thirties. In your forties, the roots are growing and you stand tall.

But the decade doesn’t come without its bumps and bruises, of course.

I’m not a doctor or therapist, so I can’t offer any medical advice, and I know that everyone will have a different experience. But the forties may bring about some of these changes for you whether emotionally, or physically.

 

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The Man/Woman Who Push-Pulls Your Relationship: What You Need to Know

You have someone in your life, male or female, who comes close to you, and then drifts further away. This person approaches you on his or her terms, gets involved, and then runs for cover while you’re left feeling abandoned, doubtful of yourself and in pain.

Sound familiar?

Welcome to the push-pull cycle. Where the partner comes in, withdraws, comes in and withdraws again, all to your detriment.

Why the hell is this happening? Why does this man/woman do this? I bet you’ve said all of those things, more than fifty times in your own head.

In my twenties, I experienced this for a bit with a guy. I ended up cutting it off, and we became friends right away. Thank god. He was a much better friend, then a sexual partner and boyfriend, and I was happy to offer friendship. Years later, he kicks himself and says how beautiful I am and wonderful. We are still friends, years later! We’ve been there for each other through a lot. It’s pretty awesome.

Trust me– I see how he aged and how I aged. He regrets it. He was afraid I was too free-spirited for a committed relationship. It turns out I wasn’t, but at least we could be friends … and for 15 years!

If you are reading this page and landed here like me, you probably are the one who is being pushed and pulled away. You probably feel really bad about yourself, wondering why this person would do this to you. You probably feel down about yourself, wondering what you did wrong. You probably feel downright crazy.

Wipe your tears, get your sexiest outfit or– whip out your razors boys, and stop blaming yourself.

Learn what’s what with this push-pull character

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A Day in the Life of My DDDDs

6 AM: Morning arrives much earlier than I would like. (Thank you, adulthood.) While my soul is crushed that the alarm has sounded and I have, in short order, exceeded the maximum number of snooze hits, there is one delightfully happy part of me: my boobs.

My boobs greet the morning with unadulterated joy. Why are my boobs so happy, you may ask? Because freedom. Unlike the rest of me, they awaken in an unguarded state of leisure.

6:15 AM: I hit the shower. My chest continues flying free. Life is good as a braless 30DDDD/30F UK/30G EU (damn, bra sizes are complicated) woman in the morning.

But as every woman knows, she’s only as good as her best-fitting over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder. As great as freedom feels, it’s time to secure the girls in a bra that will help them live their best life as I go out and live mine.

Read More: A Day in the Life of My DDDDs

Best Boobs Forward,

Laura

8 Ways to Raise Up Other Women in Honor of International Women’s Day

There is no point in having an International Women’s Day if we don’t do anything to celebrate ourselves as women and other women as well. And while I highly encourage every woman to celebrate herself all the time, 24/7, there is one thing we should really do on this special day for women, and that’s raise each other up.

We all know what it’s like to be “taken down” by another woman—to feel another woman’s wrath, judgment and/or jealousy. And in response to that, I have heard a lot of women say how they don’t like being friends with other women because of that. To me, I just think that person isn’t choosing the right ladies to be friends with!

Women are powerful. In the words of Diane Mariechild, “A woman is the full circle. Within her is the power to create, nurture and transform.”

So, let us help other women by nurturing them so they can transform to be the very best women they’re meant to be, in the following ways:

Read More: 8 Ways to Raise Up Other Women in Honor of International Women’s Day

Rising,

Laura

9 Ways Strong Women Are Better At Relationships Than The Rest Of Us

Strong women handle a relationship differently than women who are just not that strong. And that’s often a good thing and not a bad thing, despite the stereotypes surrounding it. From the first date to the act of commitment, a strong woman has so many feelings and values that dictate how she manages, selects, and opens up to a partner.

All too often, though, people make assumptions about strong women that are false. They’ll say a strong woman is too picky, too cold, or too independent. The list goes on and on. Strength is seen as a barrier to commitment when it really makes her a better and stronger partner. But any real man can appreciate her for these qualities.

So, from one strong woman’s heart and voice, here are 9 things strong women do completely different in relationships than other women who aren’t quite there yet.

1. She can live with or without you.

She doesn’t need you to make her life. Her life is already made. You, as her partner, simply just add to it. Maybe you find that a bit scary. Maybe you worry she’ll get bored of you or won’t need you.

That’s not the case. If she picked you, she picked you, but she knows that her happiness depends on her and not you or anyone else.

Read More: 9 Ways Strong Women Are Better At Relationships Than The Rest Of Us

Strong Enough,

Laura

9 Reasons It’s Completely Okay (And Normal) For A Strong Woman To Need A Man

One of my biggest pet peeves as a single mom is when people tell me how strong I am; that I’m so strong, I don’t need a man. When manual labors present themselves, random friends from the “friend choir” will say, “You can do it yourself! I do it myself. I don’t need a man.”

Don’t get me wrong. I can do plenty myself. I’m very independent and I run a household alone and have for almost four years. I consider myself a feminist too, but since when was needing someone so terrible?

Okay, so “needing” someone in a needy, clingy way is a turn-off. Codependency is a turn-off. Needing someone in your life to partner with you is not. It’s really more about wanting a strong partner.

Why does being a feminist or a strong woman have to translate as not needing a man (or woman, depending on your preference)? There are many reasons why strong women need men and why it’s normal. She should never have to apologize for it. Here’s why.

1. Teamwork makes the dream work.

A strong woman has a great foundation in which a partnership can build something even more fabulous. There’s nothing wrong with going solo, but wanting a partner to carry out big dreams and ideas is great.

Sorry haters, but it takes two to row a boat. There’s no shame of wanting someone on board the ship.

Read More: 9 Reasons It’s Completely Okay (And Normal) For A Strong Woman To Need A Man

The Power of Two,

Laura

12 Women Share the Compliment That Made Them Feel Amazing

Words aren’t always cheap, and talk isn’t always hot air. One compliment can do a lot to a heart that was so happy to hear it. Genuine notes of appreciation go so far with someone. It’s amazing, powerful, and a bit scary to know that what you say to someone can impact him or her for the bad . . . or good . . . forever. I still remember the time one of my favorite people said he was proud of me and how my daughter is lucky to have me.

I spoke to women who shared with me the words that someone said to them that impacted their hearts for the better. What has someone said to you that made you feel amazing?

1-“I was walking down the street and a young woman stopped me and said, ‘Excuse me, you’re beautiful.’ I was stunned.”

2-“My sweetie says I light up the room when I walk in.”

3-“A man said I’m the most beautiful woman he knew in real life and that I was the smartest person he knew.”

Read More:  12 Women Share the Compliment That Made Them Feel Amazing

Say Something Sweet,

Laura

9 Signs You’re WAY Hotter At 30 Than You Were At 20

Ladies, don’t take this the wrong way because you’re gorgeous at any and every age, but there is something about moving past your twenties that takes a woman from hot to intoxicating. I don’t think I’m the only one who thinks this, either.

But unless you’re skeptical and wondering how getting older can make you “hotter,” remember that sex appeal and beauty are not just about the absence of wrinkles or a perky butt. Sex appeal is a more sophisticated beast than just symmetrical and appealing facial features with a nice body to match.

Here are 9 reasons why you’re hotter in your thirties than your twenties.

1. You don’t worry about looking perfect.

When you’re in your twenties, your outfit, your makeup, your shoes, your everything has to be just right. Even if your look is boho chic, your “look” must be right. This desire for everything to be perfect is normal but stifling.

There’s something really sexy about not caring what you look like (within reason). And the older you get, the less likely you are to panic about these things; instead, you wear what you like and what works and don’t worry about if it’s just right.

Read More: 9 Signs You’re WAY Hotter At 30 Than You Were At 20

Confidence is Key,

Laura