12 Days of Christmas, Single Mom Style

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Photo by Ira Ostafijchuk on Unsplash

I tend to listen to holiday music ad nausem because I miss singing in choir; this season always reminds me of numerous years of concerts I either sang or sang and played an instrument in over the years. But, as I “race” to get stuff done– and try to remember hiding the elves for my daughter, and oh can’t forget Hanukkah too, it all blurs by. This is when I wish I had four hands instead of two, but part of being a single mom is learning how to be more than one person. Guess what? I still haven’t quite learned because it’s just not possible.

It had me making up my own little 12 days of Christmas song– if only.

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What Does His Holiday Gift Really Mean? What About Her Holiday Card?

kari-shea-CqKNkmNNLnI-unsplash.jpgPhoto by Kari Shea on Unsplash

Okay– so, it’s holiday time and you’re unwrapping a gift from your love interest or partner … or maybe not. Maybe there is no gift. No gift?!

There are 15 days left til Christmas and 12 until Hanukkah, so …

What does your partner or love interest’s gift mean? What does his or her card mean? Well, I’m not a psychic, but I use these rules of thumb when analyzing a gift or card and what it means.

What Your Love Interest or Partner’s Gift REALLY Means

1. No Gift

Well, damn! That’s the absolute worst. No gift is just a clear sign that the person doesn’t give a hoot about you or, is completely forgetful and thoughtless.

Even people who are forgetful often do remember in the last few minutes.

If someone doesn’t get you a gift, chances are this person is not interested in you.

That indeed, sucks.

2. A Gift Card

This person is really busy and wanted to make sure he or she hit the mark when it came to your holiday gift.

Or, the person doesn’t want to devote much time to buying you a gift.

I typically buy gift cards for friends and family so they can treat themselves, but for a romantic partner, I’d rather buy a gift unless I am unsure where I stand with the person.

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How to Handle Being Single at The Holidays

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Photo by Roberto Nickson on Unsplash

Single at the holidays? It can make you feel that truly, baby– it’s damn cold outside! Not to mention those lonely mistletoes hanging around with no action to be seen. Of course, your bedroom isn’t seeing much action either, eh?

I think too many people put pressure to have love at the holidays. Not that I can blame them. Kissing at midnight when the ball drops? Champagne and bubble baths? Getting some warmth on these frigid December nights? It all sounds incredibly appealing …

So, what do you do then if you’re single? If you enjoy your single days– well then, yay! Simply bask in the joy of not having to buy someone else a gift. Or dealing with someone’s family.

However if it bothers you, here are some things to keep in mind: Continue reading

A Single Mom’s Christmas (Er, Hanukkah too) List

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Photo by Food Photographer | Jennifer Pallian on Unsplash

The other day my daughter said she was upset because Santa leaves her way more presents than he does for me.

I’m a single parent and also, single. Thankfully, she believes in Santa. Not thankfully, I can only buy so many “fake” presents for myself. I told her that I tell Santa to not bring gifts for me and instead, to leave for her. This seemed to placate her.

In truth, while I wouldn’t mind a pair of diamond earrings, some dance classes and new shoes and a nice coat, I don’t view gifts in the same light as I used to. Or the holidays.

I won’t lie that nice gifts are attractive, but they don’t mean the same thing to me anymore. It’s not a priority for me. When I envision the holidays, I consider the people I will be spending them with and the experiences I will have with them. I would rather have love than diamonds. Time with someone than a gift to unwrap.

Today, as I cleared off my car of the first ice and snow of the season, I was reminded of how great it would be if I had had someone to do it for me while I got my kid ready for school, instead of spending 20 minutes doing it on top of everything else.

And while that’s not the same as seeing the tree in NYC with your partner or sharing champagne on New Year’s, it’s truly just the snapshot of how wonderful having someone great can be. Having someone to be present for you and helpful, is better than a present.

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Dual Holiday Celebrations? How to Celebrate Hanukkah and Christmas Without Blowing a Gasket!

Growing up, I didn’t get a Jewish education, but we celebrated the Jewish holidays. My mom had converted from Catholicism and Protestantism to Judaism for my father and then years later when I met my ex-husband, I started to celebrate the Christian holidays with him as well as the Jewish ones. Back in my parents’ day, this would have been considered unusual to raise children with more than one religion, but nowadays it’s more common. In fact in 2013, the Pew Research Center found that 81 percent of non-Christians in the United States celebrate Christmas. Perhaps the holiday has become more American than religious for those of us raised in this country who comes from non-Christian backgrounds?

Read More: Dual Holiday Celebrations? How to Celebrate Hanukkah and Christmas Without Blowing a Gasket!

Keeping Zen & Merry Chrismukkah!

Laura