How to Pick Up The Pieces After Someone Disappoints or Abandons You

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Photo by Saksham Gangwar on Unsplash

Hurt. Disappointment. Skepticism. Lack of trust. Lack of faith. Anger. Sadness. Anxiety.

When people we love, whether it’s a friend, coworker, partner, parent or whomever– abandon us out of nowhere, it is very painful. Even if it wasn’t out of nowhere– it still hurts.

Knowing that person didn’t care enough about you as a person is a hard pill to swallow.

When you rely on someone and trust them and that person hurts you, leaving you to deal with the heartache that person left behind– it’s not easy!

How do you deal with those feelings?

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3 Ways to Deal With Disappointment

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It is really hard when someone or something disappoints us.

When we put our best effort or hopes into anything or anyone, be it a relationship, a new job or a new venture, if it doesn’t work out or things don’t go as planned, it can be difficult to pick up the pieces and start over. Or, forgive and forget and forge ahead. Or even further still, not let the pain get in the way of our own growth.

Everyone feels disappointed now and then. For some of us, disappointment may seem to literally come and come and come– without ceasing to end for a while– but it always does go away.

How we deal with these disappointments are key to how we grow from them.

Here are 3 healthy ways to cope with disappointment:

Take Time Alone to Think

Taking some time on your own to reflect and consider how this disappointment played out is helpful.

Consider:

  • If your expectations were fair
  • If you put your best effort in
  • If there was a way you may have contributed to the situation
  • If there is anything you could do to feel better and heal

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What to Do When Someone Won’t Commit

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Photo by Nadia Jamnik on Unsplash

The other day, a friend was asking me for advice. He wanted to know what to do next.

Yup, male friends often turn to their female friends in these situations.

Someone he had been seeing and dating for a while had told him she didn’t want to further the relationship. They were really close and things were clicking … but then she said that while she really liked him, she wanted to be alone and stay away from committing or getting involved with him. He, heartbroken and looking to me for some solace, wants to be with her and told her he would be patient, but realized that there was nothing left he could do. He had tried so hard and was really great to her, but her position was firm: she wanted to be selfish at this point in her life, and as great as he is– it didn’t matter to her, sadly.  He knew the only thing he could do would be to move forward.

“What next?” he said.

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If You’re Feeling Defeated in Love or Life, Read This

There is no worse feeling than defeat. That feeling when you have tried really hard to be your best you, repair a relationship family or romantic, reach a goal or what have you, and you failed.

Failure is devastating but to me, defeat is worse. Failure at least implies courage and an attempt made.

Defeat is pure loss.

It’s the relationship that didn’t work out. The dream that died. The reparations not repaired. The goal not reached.

When you feel defeated, how do you get back up again and believe in yourself when it feels impossible?

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What to Do When Someone Won’t Commit

There is no greater pain than love and commitment not returned or worse, retracted.

It is very easy to blame yourself for this person’s state of mind and feeling. It is very easy to retreat into your pain.

But, here are a few things you should do when dealing with someone who can’t commit to save your sanity:

1. Remember It’s Not You– It’s Them

 The person has issues with commitment that probably have nothing to do with you. You have no idea what the person may have experienced prior to meeting you. That person could be a mess. Maybe they don’t know good love from bad love.

And even if it’s you like, say you aren’t a match for them or they don’t love you back … it doesn’t mean you aren’t a match for someone else.

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6 Steps to Get Over Someone for Good

Have you been crying or depressed over someone? Agonizing over why the person won’t commit, dumped you or is annoying in some other way?

Join the club. We’ve all felt that torturous sting of love. The one woman/man who can’t make up her mind. The guy/gal who can’t commit for sh*t. The other flake who dumped you out of nowhere. The dude that ghosted you.

It’s hard to recover when your heart hurts and it feels like the pain will never end. But it will.

Read on for 6 steps on how to get over that chump, get your revenge and move forward!

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