15 Signs That You’ve Found Honest-to-Goodness “True Love”

How do you know when it’s true love? You just know. OK, beyond that answer, there are certain signs that make it completely obvious that you and this person are just meant to be. It’s that feeling in your bones that you know this person makes your life inexplicably better, even during the rough times that every couple experiences over the course of their relationship.

Whether it’s that comfortable silence or the complete feeling of trust, true love is such a gift that one must never take for granted, abuse, walk away from, or disrespect. Because if these signs ring true for you . . . you’re one of the lucky ones.

Read More: 15 Signs That You’ve Found Honest-to-Goodness “True Love”

It’s For Real,

Laura

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How My Divorce Turned Me Into The Independent Woman I Am Today

When I first met my ex-husband, I was wrapping up a period in which I saw an amazing therapist. I was working on myself and trying to overcome certain things and doing a great job, but still had a ways to go. But hey—each journey begins with one step, right?

I say that I had a ways to go because when I met my ex-husband, I really believed that maybe I wasn’t quite good enough yet and that the relationship was proof that I was indeed, good enough. If you don’t know this, a healthy relationship begins with two people who already know they are worthy of love, and not needing a relationship to “confirm” this belief. Unfortunately, my ex used this to his advantage numerous times, trying to remind me how basically, I wasn’t all that great or smart and that I had “so many problems,” unlike him, who was apparently, untouchable from problems that the rest of the population had. Empathy was not his strong suit.

This isn’t to say that he never said good things about me and this isn’t to say I was the perfect wife. I wasn’t perfect. I made mistakes of course like anyone, but that narrative was I was slightly lesser than and needed his help. Who wrote the narrative? Was it me? Him? Both of us?

Read More: How My Divorce Turned Me Into The Independent Woman I Am Today 

Stronger,

Laura

9 Ways Strong Women Are Better At Relationships Than The Rest Of Us

Strong women handle a relationship differently than women who are just not that strong. And that’s often a good thing and not a bad thing, despite the stereotypes surrounding it. From the first date to the act of commitment, a strong woman has so many feelings and values that dictate how she manages, selects, and opens up to a partner.

All too often, though, people make assumptions about strong women that are false. They’ll say a strong woman is too picky, too cold, or too independent. The list goes on and on. Strength is seen as a barrier to commitment when it really makes her a better and stronger partner. But any real man can appreciate her for these qualities.

So, from one strong woman’s heart and voice, here are 9 things strong women do completely different in relationships than other women who aren’t quite there yet.

1. She can live with or without you.

She doesn’t need you to make her life. Her life is already made. You, as her partner, simply just add to it. Maybe you find that a bit scary. Maybe you worry she’ll get bored of you or won’t need you.

That’s not the case. If she picked you, she picked you, but she knows that her happiness depends on her and not you or anyone else.

Read More: 9 Ways Strong Women Are Better At Relationships Than The Rest Of Us

Strong Enough,

Laura

The 6 Types Of (Healthy) Fights Every Long-Lasting Relationship Must Have To Survive

Fighting constantly is a sign of a bad relationship, but on the flip side, never arguing at all is not only rare, but also not particularly healthy. If you can’t ever disagree constructively with your partner, one has to wonder how healthy and stable your relationship truly is.

Many of us panic during the very first argument we have with someone we love, as disagreement brings up a lot of anxiety for all of us, and we might not know how to fight effectively. However, having healthy relationship fights indicates two people who respect each other.

And let’s be honest: there are some words and some topics that really don’t belong in relationship fights with someone you love. The problem is, so many of us listen to respond, rather than listen to understand.

The bottom line is that there are certain fights you should have in your relationship, all of which indicate you belong together.

1. Fights about the direction your relationship is headed

Obviously, you two should be headed in the same direction when it comes to your commitment level, but if you fight about it initially, it’s a good sign the two of you are being direct and honest about your needs.

Read More: The 6 Types Of (Healthy) Fights Every Long-Lasting Relationship Must Have To Survive

Fight for Your Right to Fight–Respectfully,

Laura

5 Transformative Thoughts To Allow Love Into Your Life

Love is transformative if you allow it into your life. Some of us allow or have allowed people into our lives when in truth, they aren’t good for us or positive for us. Why? Well, because we often carry our own issues with us that prevent us from making smart choices in love. From low self-esteem to past hurts, sometimes we choose partners through the looking-glass lenses of damaged hearts and minds.

Does this mean that all is lost?

Of course not! Through these poor choices, we can grow. And after divorce is the perfect time to grow and learn from your bad choices. After divorce is the perfect time to take inventory of where you came from, where you are going and how you plan on making different decisions to gain a solid love for the future.

One of the biggest roadblocks I often see with my divorced peers is they don’t believe love is out there or generally, have a bad attitude towards love. So, here are my 5 transformative thoughts I use to allow love and positive things into my life. May it help others to do the same!

1) Your Past Doesn’t Have to Dictate Your Future

“I always meet the bad ones.”

“I always get cheated on.”

Step away from these negative statements and stop buying into them as truths. Yes, in the past you may have married a bad one, but that doesn’t mean your future will go the same way.

Stop assuming that because one or even many bad things have happened to you in love that it will always be that way. It is your assumptions and commitment to negative thinking that are getting in your way!

Read More: 5 Transformative Thoughts To Allow Love Into Your Life

It Starts With You,

Laura

8 Serious Signs You Are Self-Sabotaging Your Love Life

You’re divorced and now you’re ready to meet the right one.

Ok, got it! So many of us are looking for love, part deux.

But are you putting your best self forward? Or are you sabotaging romance before a spark can set aflame?

It’s not unusual for people to go out into the world bitter, afraid and slightly jaded after a divorce or any major breakup really. The key is really going out there and meeting people when you are truly your best self. Here are 8 serious signs you are sabotaging your love life all on your own.

1) A Billion Things on the Checklist

Before you’ve even met the person, you’ve got a billion things on the checklist someone needs to meet or you won’t consider him or her.

If your list of criteria is so stringent it is enviable to college application requirements, you’re not ready.

Yes—you should have deal breakers in your list.

Yes—you shouldn’t settle.

But no, it shouldn’t require jumping through hoops to be with you.

2) A Great Big Dump

Are you joining dates for a drink, only to prattle on about your ex or how jaded or torn you are about love and relationships?

You’re not ready. You’re a big hot mess of negativity and sorry, no one wants that.

No one wants to date your sad stories. A potential partner wants to date you—the available loving, you. Sure, you come with baggage like everyone does, but if your baggage arrives at the date before your personality can…you are not ready!

Read More: 8 Serious Signs You Are Self-Sabotaging Your Love Life 

Tellin’ Y’all It’s Sabotage…

Laura

6 Things That Keep You From Moving On

Are you separated? Newly-divorced? Struggling to find some happiness and a life of peace and joy? There are certain things that will hold you back from having the life you want. Some of these things you may not even realize are impacting you, whereas others may be more obvious.

If you’re not as happy as you hoped you would be, here are some potential things keeping you down and preventing your progress.

1. NOT FINALIZING YOUR DIVORCE

Stalling your divorce is not going to help you. Hanging onto the marriage and drawing out the separation is only going to impede your progress. Of course, you don’t want to rush a divorce agreement, but stalling or thinking that making it legal doesn’t matter, is a bad move.

It will keep you from cutting ties and starting afresh.

Read More: 6 Things That Keep You From Moving On 

Move On, Friend,

Laura

10 Small But Powerful Things Men Do Differently When They Want To Marry You

It’s hard to know from the start whether someone will have real potential or not, but as things develop between you and someone you care about, little things might just start to pop up. These “little things” are really major signs that the man you’re with is considering marrying you.

They’re not the big signs like moving in together or asking you about ring styles, but they’re the day-to-day minutiae that says he considers you to be someone much more significant than just a girlfriend or someone he’s dating.

While it can be hard to detect men who will commit to you, here are 10 tiny signs that indicate he intends to marry you.

1. He wants to be your emergency contact.

And he doesn’t shudder if you ask to put him on the list. He says yes easily as if he were rattling off his birth date or social security number.

2. He confirms plans with you first.

When you’re a girlfriend, you’re notified of the plans. When you’re someone he’s considering as wife material, he checks with you first. You being included on the holidays and being with you is a must. At the very least, he has to try and align his plans to make them your plans, too, even if it fails to work out.

Read More: 10 Small But Powerful Things Men Do Differently When They Want To Marry You

The Little Things,

Laura

10 Simple, Sexy Ways To Show A Man Intimacy (Without Jumping Into Bed)

Intimacy isn’t solely about sex. Sure, sex counts an awful lot, but that’s not the only factor that goes into building an intimate and passionate relationship.

We all know you can have sex without real intimacy and connection, but how can you be intimate with a man beyond or besides simply intercourse? Here’s how to be intimate without jumping into bed, and they are guaranteed to make his body ache just a little.

1. Give each other a naked massage.

Forget the clothes. Forget the half-clothed shoulder rubs. Get naked, both of you, and give him a massage.