When You Can’t Go Further in a Relationship Due to the Other Person

Photo by Mr Xerty on Unsplash

 

Every relationship– friendship or romantic– has a path. Some are meant to go the distance and others, not so much. Some relationships– romantic ones– never even take off. And that I think, is the worst.

To fail at a relationship or marriage is really sad and challenging. Devastating. But to me, a relationship that never takes off is even worse.

There is the feeling that with a failed marriage or relationship, at least you got to try and give it your all. You can look back and say, “Sure, I made mistakes, but I still gave it my all most of the time.”

When you are with someone and feel the potential but it never comes to fruition, there is never that feeling of “I tried and failed– but hey! I tried!”

Instead, there is the feeling of “What if?” and “Why?”

“What happened?” and “What went wrong?”

4 Ways COVID-19 Showed Me People’s True Colors– & I’ll Never Forget This

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Photo by Zach Ahmajani on Unsplash

This virus has been the most difficult thing any of us have experienced in a lifetime– unless perhaps, if you were also alive during the 1918 Flu.

Challenging for everyone for different reasons, this virus has put all of our characters and collective sanity on the line.

But one thing is for sure, after this is all done, I will never ever forget the four different ways COVID-19 showed me people’s true colors. Not ever.

1. I learned who helps and who is just hot-air

The people who have helped myself and my daughter have been so valuable. There is nothing like having support when you are trying to raise a little girl on your own. There is nothing like having people who want to help and make things better for you.

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What It’s Like When Someone Likes You, BUT Doesn’t Like You Enough

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Photo by Cody Black on Unsplash

When I was in my twenties, I dated this guy who was very much my type, but also really flaky. Hot and cold, he wanted the relationship but didn’t want the relationship. I really liked him and wanted the relationship, but he would change his mind a lot. It was annoying.

I hit my breaking point one day as I was going to visit my family for the holidays from the city, where I was living. I was sad and tired. Sad of him being a flaky pain in my butt. Sad of feeling neglected and also, on his back and forth path. Enough was enough. I wanted off his space cadet tour.

I told him I was done, but happy to be friends.  I knew it wouldn’t be super easy to be friends, but I knew I would be happier and honestly, he had gotten on my nerves so much that I was at a point where I didn’t feel the same way about him.  I lost the attraction for the most part, too. Being his friend worked for me. A few months after I told him I was done, he tried holding my hand when we went to a movie. I looked at him like, “WTF,” and told him “Nope.”

He stuck to the friendship boundaries for the rest of the friendship, but, still occasionally veered off track by flirting inappropriately or saying how he wished he had given me a real chance. I avoided all that nonsense because to me, I had put him in the friend zone. I had had enough. He had had his chance. Laura was done. He had regrets– and me? I had none.

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3 Warning Signs That Your Guy/Gal Is Going to Hurt You 100%

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Photo by Matthew T Rader on Unsplash

Some people should come with warning signs on them, but unfortunately, life isn’t that easy. Even if it were, people would still probably go out with “dangerous” individuals.

I’ve met a lot of people in my time and have sat back and watched a lot the last few years.  I’ve learned that while some people are really good at hiding stuff, there are a lot of warning signs that a man or woman is going to hurt you– and good– if you just pay attention and be smart. Keeping your guard up until you know someone is a smart move. It doesn’t mean you give no one a chance– but it means you give people a chance and reciprocate slowly in kind to their hopeful positive actions.

So basically, in the meantime, keep an open mind but also, open eyes as you get to know others. They may reveal themselves before they want to if you pay attention. It’ll save you time so you don’t waste yours. Your time is precious!

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11 Things That Make Me Happy During the Covid-19 Outbreak

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It probably sounds ironic to mention the word happy next to Covid-19, but if you’re home social distancing … you’ve got to find some semblance of happiness or you’ll go crazy. And that’s ok,too: losing your mind at times is pretty normal also.

With that said, you have to find the silver linings in all of this or you won’t ever be “ok.”

For me, it’s the following things:

Tyson Chicken

A friend brought me a bag of this crispy Tyson chicken, and I just love it. Even when I’m not hungry due to stress, I’m always in the mood for more CHICKEN.

Tea and a Good Book

I love chai tea and I love to read. These two creature comforts make me feel more relaxed.

Sweet Messages

My one friend always makes a point to send me positive messages, telling me I’m doing great taking care of my little lady or that he thought I looked great and am working hard during a virtual workout.

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Is Your Love a 100 or a 0? Loving Actions Add Up!

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Photo by Bernard Hermant on Unsplash

This is a trying time for everyone, regardless of your class, ethnicity, marital status, etc.

So, under these trying times, is your partner or love interest taking time to be loving with positive actions? Are you taking time to be loving? Is your love interest available and considerate of your feelings?

Here are a few things that add up in a positive way. If your partner or love interest isn’t doing these things, he or she isn’t “adding” up to much.

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4 Signs Someone Isn’t Learning Life Lessons During Covid-19 Outbreak

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https://unsplash.com/@element5digital

If you’re not growing and learning during this public health emergency, what exactly are you doing?
Some people seem to be missing the point of this challenging time. If you’re not getting the point — what is really important and what needs to be prioritized— you’re not learning.

Here are 4 signs you’re completely missing the point and learning nothing during this pandemic:

Lacking Commitment, Patience and Love for People Who Matter

If you can’t put down your issues and be present and available for the ones you love, you’re missing a big life lesson. If you can’t be patient with others ( and yourself) you’re also missing the point.
If you don’t prioritize someone now during this awful event— you have zero priorities.

Grumbling About When You’re Healthy

If you’re healthy, be grateful. Many people aren’t. It’s ok to be  upset about missing milestones and friends. It’s ok to be upset if you’re out of work. 

But if you’re missing the gratitude in being healthy, you’re missing the point.

Not Checking In on Loved Ones / Being an Absent Partner

Now is the time to check in however you can on loved ones from afar or in your home. Now is the time to be present. You’ll never have this kind of time at home again. Don’t make excuses. If you’re emotionally unavailable or checked out— you’ve got problems and you’re taking everyone for granted.

Being Hard on Yourself or Expecting Too Much of Others/ Oneself

Now is not the time to pressure yourself to be perfect or do fifty million things during a stressful pandemic. The same goes for others. Pressuring people or being hard on loved ones is not fair at this time. Be loving. Be patient. Be giving.

Be Safe!

Laura

Someone Who Really Cares Wants The Commitment & Wants You

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https://unsplash.com/@erik_lucatero

If there’s anything I’ve learned in my life it’s that people who care about you want you and want the commitment. They want the time with you. They want to work to make the relationship happen. They want you and will do their best to make you happy. They want the relationship to succeed and that means, making sacrifices and working to be the best individual and partner they can be.

Someone who doesn’t commit, doesn’t care.
Someone who is selfish or distant, doesn’t care.
Someone who isn’t consistent and isn’t available, doesn’t care.
He or she may like you as a friend. He or she may like you for just sex. He or she may think you’re a good person.
BUT— if he or she doesn’t commit, that person doesn’t want you and doesn’t care.

Commitment shows someone values you. Make no mistake about it.

Tale As Old As Time,

Laura

How Someone Treats You Is a Reflection of Who They Are

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Someone hurt my feelings a bit ago, and I found myself wondering what I had done to earn such behavior. When I dug deep, I realized I had done … nothing. When I spoke to a confidante about the matter, the person said plainly:

This has nothing to do with you and everything to do with this person’s self- view and own issues.

This is good advice.

How people treat us is often an indicator of how they view themselves and feel about themselves, more than anything.
Self- esteem and confidence. Past issues. These factor into many of our behaviors when we interact with others.

So, the next time someone hurts you remind yourself that this person’s actions are a reflection of how he/ she feels about him or herself. It has nothing to do with you.
Not to mention, your actions are in relation to how you feel about yourself.

All we can do is control our own actions. We can’t control if others hurt us or make bad choices. We can just choose how to respond and move forward.

Be Strong,

Laura

Someone Sent Me a Surprise Gift To Make Me Feel Loved Today

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I had a bad day today. I barely slept last night. I kept waking up every 1-2 hours like a newborn, so I was cranky today. I made it through a tough workout, but just dragged for most of the day. My kid was cranky. I was feeling down about some things. I was grateful for  the sunshine and warm temperatures, but I was definitely feeling distraught.

And then, someone did something to show me how much the person loves me.

I got a surprise package of some goodies and a few necessities. No toilet paper or paper towel, sadly.

This is exactly what I’ve been talking about in my past blog posts:

You don’t have to see someone to let them know you love the person.

You can show love in many ways.

And if a global health pandemic doesn’t make you try harder to keep your loved ones, loved— than your priorities are completely wrong.

I was feeling really upset and down today and that one small gesture said everything to me.
It made me really evaluate the people in my life. Who is really there for me. Who is really not.
Perspective is a beautiful thing.

Be Loved and Be Safe,

Laura