6 Best Traits Every Man Should Have

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Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

Not all men are equal. Well, okay– we are all equal as humans, but not all men are super awesome as the rest. Hey, like I tell myself– someone will always be funnier, smarter, prettier than you– but that doesn’t mean you’re not funny, smart or pretty!

But there are certain traits that set other men above the pack and let them shine as stellar examples. Nice pecs help, too, but I’m talking about character and personality.

Does your love interest or man have these 6  traits?

Integrity & Honor

He stands by his word. He doesn’t lie and he will tell the truth, even if it sucks.

He puts his name on everything and everyone he touches– in a positive way.

He does not half-a*s stuff. He puts in an amazing amount of effort.

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Is He Using His Job as a Coping Method?

alejandro-escamilla-LF8gK8-HGSg-unsplash.jpgPhoto by Alejandro Escamilla on Unsplash

One of the things my friends have been commenting to me lately is that the men they love tend to bury themselves in their work.

Consider that phrase- bury themselves.

Literally, suffocate themselves and their feelings by giving themselves so much work that they’re not accessible to handle their relationships or other issues of the heart. They’re not around. They’re present, but absent.

As someone whose dad worked constantly, I could relate to their feelings.

When men are depressed, anxious or any other kind of troubling emotion, they “seem” to dive into their jobs, isolating themselves from others.

Society jokes about the “man-cave” and of course the newly minted, “she-shed,” but work can be a safe place for men to dive in and ignore their feelings. This really interesting article in Psychology Today talks about the ways in which men manage their emotions.

Typically, men compartmentalize and shut out their feelings at work. So, it’s not unusual to me when people start commenting that their husbands are working too much, or that their partners are coming home late, only to find that the man in consideration is struggling with his feelings.

So, if you start to notice these signs, it’s possible that your favorite man is burying his feelings at the office or place of work.

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What Does His Holiday Gift Really Mean? What About Her Holiday Card?

kari-shea-CqKNkmNNLnI-unsplash.jpgPhoto by Kari Shea on Unsplash

Okay– so, it’s holiday time and you’re unwrapping a gift from your love interest or partner … or maybe not. Maybe there is no gift. No gift?!

There are 15 days left til Christmas and 12 until Hanukkah, so …

What does your partner or love interest’s gift mean? What does his or her card mean? Well, I’m not a psychic, but I use these rules of thumb when analyzing a gift or card and what it means.

What Your Love Interest or Partner’s Gift REALLY Means

1. No Gift

Well, damn! That’s the absolute worst. No gift is just a clear sign that the person doesn’t give a hoot about you or, is completely forgetful and thoughtless.

Even people who are forgetful often do remember in the last few minutes.

If someone doesn’t get you a gift, chances are this person is not interested in you.

That indeed, sucks.

2. A Gift Card

This person is really busy and wanted to make sure he or she hit the mark when it came to your holiday gift.

Or, the person doesn’t want to devote much time to buying you a gift.

I typically buy gift cards for friends and family so they can treat themselves, but for a romantic partner, I’d rather buy a gift unless I am unsure where I stand with the person.

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Your (My) Partner & Relationship Must-Have List

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Photo by Steve Halama on Unsplash

If I’m being honest– which I am, and usually, bluntly so– there are some things that I really find attractive in a man. My ‘no-compromise’ list I suppose however, no one will ever be the pinnacle of some list. You will find someone who meets most of your requirements, but never all– and that’s ok! The key is knowing what your “must-have’s” are versus your ” nice-to-have’s.”

Do you really know what you want in a partner and what you can’t stand?

I have spent a lot of time thinking about my must’s, nice-to-have’s and don’t want’s, and I feel like it’s a good exercise to put what I want out into the universe. And I highly suggest you all do the same: find your absolute must-have’s in a human, and write it out– state it aloud!– and claim that person to the universe before you may have even met them. Owning what and who you want and being really hardcore honest with yourself is so important to making great relationships. In the past, I wasn’t honest and I ignored red flag after red flag, which did me no good. So for now, I’m owning what I want.

1. I really like a man who is Calm.

As a complete firecracker and siren, a calm man really just balances me and by calm, I don’t mean dull. I simply mean easy-going or not quick to freak out.

A man who is even-keeled and does not have a temper is really my speed.

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Where Do You Stand With Your Man?

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Men are pretty simple I think. I don’t say that to be condescending or negative. I see the simplicity as a positive. Basically, if a man likes you, you know it. If he’s on the fence about you– you know it. If he doesn’t like you– you know it. Of course, there is always room for situational and individual differences. Some men may be shy or, unsure of how to read your signals in response to him, whether you’re a woman or another man. This may make him appear as more or less interested depending on the situation.

But as a general guide, here are some signs to notice when you’re trying to decide where you stand with a man.

1. How He Sees You & When He Sees You

If a man likes you, he makes an effort to see you despite his hectic schedule.

He also will make sure to see you to do things with you or to just hang and talk to you– not just to fool around.  Not that there is anything wrong with physical intimacy!  Intimacy is very important, but, there is a difference between physical intimacy and a hook up, so don’t count frequent texts to come over for “action” as an indicator of deep emotions.

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Really Good Men Exist– Here’s What to Look For

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Photo by Matheus Ferrero on Unsplash

“A good man is hard to find.”– Flannery O’Connor

If you’ve been searching, swiping, checking out or just in general, chatting up a lad and are curious of how he rates, well– time will certainly answer that question for you.

However, if you want to  know if you’ve met a man who is a good man at heart or one who needs to take a hike, read on:

1. He is thoughtful

Someone who makes the effort to get to know you and pay attention to the things you like is a good man.

2. He is protective– not controlling

Yes, you’re an independent woman but a good man wants to protect you because you matter to him. This is not the same as someone who is controlling. This is a man who cares and values you and wants you to be safe and happy.

3. He is warm and giving

He wants to make you smile and enjoys making you happy.

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Why Men Enjoy the Chase & How to Make Him Run

I can’t make any definitive generalizations but, many men do enjoy chasing people that they are interested in. Some because they want to have many admirers, others because they like pursuing unavailable partners, and others simply because the chase validates the interest’s worth and makes the relationship feel like a victory. If he has to work to earn his love’s interest, it will feel like a valuable relationship worth investing in.

Some people are masters of the chase. And some people are masters of “being chased” and others not.

As much as it seems game-like and perhaps high school-esque, allowing a man to chase you is a great idea. Here are 4 things you can do to make him run:

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The Man/Woman Who Push-Pulls Your Relationship: What You Need to Know

You have someone in your life, male or female, who comes close to you, and then drifts further away. This person approaches you on his or her terms, gets involved, and then runs for cover while you’re left feeling abandoned, doubtful of yourself and in pain.

Sound familiar?

Welcome to the push-pull cycle. Where the partner comes in, withdraws, comes in and withdraws again, all to your detriment.

Why the hell is this happening? Why does this man/woman do this? I bet you’ve said all of those things, more than fifty times in your own head.

In my twenties, I experienced this for a bit with a guy. I ended up cutting it off, and we became friends right away. Thank god. He was a much better friend, then a sexual partner and boyfriend, and I was happy to offer friendship. Years later, he kicks himself and says how beautiful I am and wonderful. We are still friends, years later! We’ve been there for each other through a lot. It’s pretty awesome.

Trust me– I see how he aged and how I aged. He regrets it. He was afraid I was too free-spirited for a committed relationship. It turns out I wasn’t, but at least we could be friends … and for 15 years!

If you are reading this page and landed here like me, you probably are the one who is being pushed and pulled away. You probably feel really bad about yourself, wondering why this person would do this to you. You probably feel down about yourself, wondering what you did wrong. You probably feel downright crazy.

Wipe your tears, get your sexiest outfit or– whip out your razors boys, and stop blaming yourself.

Learn what’s what with this push-pull character

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9 Traits Grown Women Find Seriously Attractive in Men

Lots of guys ask questions like, “Why do girls like bad boys?”, wondering what it is women find even remotely attractive about men who end up hurting them. But if you really want to know how to get a girl to like you, the last place you should look for inspiration about what women find attractive are those rebels without a clue. And women, you should be paying no attention at all to those bad boys. They’ll only leave you high and dry, and they’re really no fun, save for – maybe – a few bedroom romps.

Honestly, if you’re over 21, you probably already know how quickly these kinds of guys lose their appeal. They’ve got a clear expiration date. They’re cute when they’re young, but as a girl matures into a woman, her patience for them disappears. And while the saying that “Good men are hard to find” may be popular for good reason, the good news is that at least they aren’t impossible to find. They do exist! And when we ladies finally figure out how to find a good man, there are so many things about that person that we love that we cannot help but overlook the small things he might do to upset us.

Truly, when you break it down, bad guys are “boys,” but good guys are “men.” Would you rather play with a boy – or run with a man? So guys, here are the dominant personality traits grown women find most attractive and utterly irresistible about a good man that make bad boys look like little babies. (After all, ladies, if you want to find a good man, you need to know what you’re looking for and why these men are so much better than that “bad boy” who’s been stringing you along.)

Read More: 9 Traits Grown Women Find Seriously Attractive in Men

Boys Drool, Men Rule,

Laura

10 Men Share How They Know Whether A Woman Is Short-Term Fun Or Worthy Of A Long-Term Relationship

Have you ever wondered what makes a guy settle down? Have you ever watched a lifelong bachelor finally decide on someone? What about your guy friends? Have you seen them swoon over one woman and act indifferent to another? Have you, as a woman, sat there before or during a date and made some sort of strategy, whether it was to hold off on kissing, sex, or avoiding or encouraging certain kinds of conversations?

I’ve spent a lot of time wondering how men categorize women they meet, strategizing and deciding how much of myself to reveal, give or offer up. After all, that’s what will make a good relationship in the long-run.

It’s always seemed straightforward: if a woman really likes a man, she should make him work for it and not give up too much. Because if a woman is too quick to hop in bed or seems to be too eager to be involved, a man puts her in that “short-term fling” category, instead of someone he’d want a long-term relationship with.

Read More: 10 Men Share How They Know Whether A Woman Is Short-Term Fun Or Worthy Of A Long-Term Relationship

Get the Scoop,

Laura