Why We Shouldn’t Shame Moms Who Hate Infancy

A month or two ago, a woman who I knew as an acquaintance at my gym had her first baby.

“How’s it going?” I asked, congratulating her and asking how she was feeling, something I noticed most people don’t do.

It’s all about the baby, after all.

“It’s OK, you know, she’s not sleeping very well and she cries a lot. I mean a lot, a lot!”

I heard it in her speech: infancy was not her cup of tea right now.

“I’m so sorry. You know, it’s OK if you hate this right now. My daughter slept very well, but I’ve had friends and family who dealt with colic.”

Looking at me with a face of relief: “Thank you — you’re the first person I’ve been able to be honest with. The first person who asked how I was. Honestly, I’m struggling and totally hating it. I feel so guilty.”

Read More: Why We Shouldn’t Shame Moms Who Hate Infancy

Support All Moms,

Laura

10 Things I Did As A New Parent That I Would NEVER Do Again

As a first time parent there are always things you do because you’re a nervous newbie who’s learning on the go. Or in other words, new parenting is basically trial-by-fire and sometimes it can be explosive, especially those breastfed baby poops.

Here are a few things I wouldn’t do as a new parent if I had the chance to start all over again.

  1. Throwing big birthday parties

Since my former husband and I started celebrating our daughter’s birthday with a big celebration, it means the expectations are set high. To pull back and say, “Oh, let’s just havefamily over for cake” right now would be an epic fail because expectations have fallen into place. This does NOT mean that I can’t say, “Hey daughter, parties are expensive. Let’s scale down this year,” but it does make it harder.

Truthfully, I have one child and I don’t mind celebrating her birthday in style, especially for the first birthday (which is really a party for the parents, but maybe I would’ve gone more low-key after that until kindergarten). Once you set the bar high with anything in life, it’s hard to lower it; it’s key in all aspects of parenthood to set realistic expectations for our children.

Read More: 10 Things I Did As A New Parent That I Would NEVER Do Again

Live and Learn,

Laura